The Worst Films of 2016
While I always have lists for the good films and some other truly memorable ones each year, the hugely disproportionate ratio tilted towards the mediocre to the downright deplorable movies annually, urges me to compile this list of of bad movies. Monumental disasters in most departments of filmmaking, these films failed to provide something even remotely resembling mild entertainment (let's not even get into their creative or technical aspects).
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- DirectorRajeev ChaudhariStarsSunny LeoneRajneesh DuggalDaniel WeberA young and ambitious woman's life suddenly comes crashing down when she is betrayed in love. Determined to get revenge she reinvents herself as a successful businesswoman.With dialogues so tacky and incredulous that you can't help but constantly guffaw at them; characters that have constipated countenances and cardboard expressions (except Sunny Leone; honestly, she's the best thing about the movie, which isn't saying much); a hackneyed script unearthed from a regressive, embarrassing time-capsule that would have looked out of place even in the 40s; and a Director who's so clueless of his own as well as the film's shortcomings that he takes the entire affair way too seriously, Beiimaan Love is the latest entrant to the club of movies that are 'so bad that they're good'. And as a movie-buff, you can't help but be glad to have found a new gem to add to your 'bad movie collection'. Guess for that reason alone, Director Rajeev Chaudhari deserves a pat on his back.
0/5 stars - DirectorPa. RanjithStarsRajinikanthWinston ChaoRadhika ApteA reformed gangster is released from prison and attempts to protect his family from his enemies.Almost every scene is disjointed, characters pop up randomly, do stuff even more randomly, logic is completely tossed out, things happen for no reason, reasonable things happen too late to make a difference, and you end up staring with your mouth agape and head throbbing at as one incredulity after the next unfolds. It's like the Director-writer and Pa. Ranjith and the rest of the production unit didn't even bother trying just because they got Rajinikanth on board, and seeing their lackadaisical attitude, the superstar responsible for their lack of effort didn't try much to salvage something from this hotchpotch of drivel himself. Kabali is all about hero worshiping and absolutely nothing else. We just wonder if even Rajini's most-diehard fans will find this endless exercise in hero-worship worth the wait and hype.
0.5/5 stars - DirectorRick MoralesStarsAdam WestBurt WardJulie NewmarBatman and Robin of the 1960s live action series are back in action to take down their fiendish foes united once more against them.Maybe it's a generation gap thing or maybe I'm just too used to seeing a darker. more-believable, and contrasting more rational version of Batman, but the dialogues were way too corny for my taaste; the conflict was way too contrived; and the action was too asinine to be even remotely engaging. Every time Robin muttered one of his trademark idioms in a desperate attempt to evoke nostalgia, I felt like whacking him senseless and leaving his limp frame for the Joker to do as he pleases. Hell, even the Joker was unbearably silly in this one.
It's not like I'm ranting on this version of the caped crusaders because I'm too accustomed to their somber personas from Nolan's or Burton's films. Even Nolan infused some good humor in his films. But, there's a difference between being goofy and laughably silly, and the makers needn't have looked further than the 1966 show they claim to have drawn inspiration from. The makers of that show knew the difference from whatever few episodes I have managed to watch. That was goofy fun. This is just plain, inanely unbearable.
1/5 stars - DirectorZack SnyderStarsBen AffleckHenry CavillAmy AdamsBatman is manipulated by Lex Luthor to fear Superman. Superman´s existence is meanwhile dividing the world and he is framed for murder during an international crisis. The heroes clash and force the neutral Wonder Woman to reemerge.“Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice” derails a potentially powerful story along with some of the most iconic heroes of comic folklore for an obsession with dark tones and darker themes that are all just a poor excuse for mimicking Christopher Nolan’s “Dark Knight Trilogy” masterpiece. While that trilogy was by far the darkest of all superhero movies, it was also extremely engrossing, thoroughly entertaining, and overall fun to watch, with even a bit of humor strewn here and there – elements that Director Zack Snyder and writer completely forgot were intrinsic to a superhero film’s success. In aiming for everything dark and grimy under the night sky, things certainly don’t need to get lifeless and morose.
“Dawn of Justice” is plainly and simply a shockingly joyless and overtly prolonged affair that presents its two beacons of justice as angry, cranky, melancholic, gullible men-in-tights. The big, loud, bloated nature of the film, with everything transpiring within it feeling vacuous, makes “Dawn of Justice” a profoundly dissatisfying film that’s ugly, incoherent, and unmitigatedly boring in every sense.
1/5 stars - DirectorDuncan JonesStarsTravis FimmelPaula PattonBen FosterAs an Orc horde invades the planet Azeroth using a magic portal, a few human heroes and dissenting Orcs must attempt to stop the true evil behind this war.Between copious visual delights, a talented cast and a Director who’s capable of so much more are criminally wasted in a lethargic and ultimately tiresome adaptation of a world-famous game, which will feel completely hollow to those who’ve played it day-in-and-day-out and utterly pointless to those who’ve never been allured by the charms of these role-playing temptations. Warcraft is a land of magic you don’t want to visit, with spells whose only potency is either to put you to sleep or induce a desire of shredding the theater screen in disdain of what you’ve subjected yourself to.
1.2/5 stars - DirectorAbhishek KapoorStarsAditya Roy KapoorKatrina KaifTabuModern adaptation of Charles Dickens' Great Expectations; a poor but talented boy falls in love with a girl from an affluent family.Abhishek Kapoor clearly has “grand ambitions” with his “Great Expectations” (pun intended). In adapting Charles Dickens' seminal literary classic to the Indian screen, he mostly gets the milieu right but everything else is a hot mess, with a cold setting. The script meanders, takes far too long to come to the point, and the subplots take away from the main love story, which doesn't have much love or passion in it to begin with. And, as if taking a cue from Abhishek Kapoor's lackluster Direction and the sluggishness of the screenplay, Aditya Roy Kapur and Katrina Kaif, too, do their best to not infuse any romance or passion to their chemistry (or rather the lack of it), which quickly fizzles when it really needed to sizzle. A lot of the tonal inconsistencies arise from the loose adaptation of the great material. Maybe, just maybe, Abhishek Kapoor should stick to adapting Chetan Bhagat’s books for the big screen. How else does one explain a Director going from two great films like “Rock On” and “Kai Po Che” to this tripe? Now, “Fitoor” does score some points for its breathtaking cinematography, opulent sets, and lavish costumes. Sadly, the editing lags and lacks any slickness, with the film going on for far too long. In the end, “Fitoor” doesn't spare Kashmir, Delhi, London, or even Pakistan (which somehow finds its way into this tale), and certainly not the audience.
1.3/5 stars - DirectorMike MitchellWalt DohrnStarsAnna KendrickJustin TimberlakeZooey DeschanelAfter the Bergens invade Troll Village, Poppy, the happiest Troll ever born, and the curmudgeonly Branch set off on a journey to rescue her friends.One lurid character farts glitter and another, even more-lurid one, poops cupcakes. That about sums up the length, breath, and depth of this film's reach, impact, and what it sets out to achieve. Forget about the assault on your senses if you're an adult, this could have a long-lasting grievous impact in molding the impressionable minds of your little ones in a highly inane and utterly ludicrous fashion. A kids film needn't always be a Zootopia, a Spirited Away, a Lion King, or even something like Dreamworks' own, How to Train Your Dragon. (Let's face it, those are the cream of the crop, which makes them rare occurrences.) It can also be silly fun without dumbing things down and having potentially undesirable consequences in shaping the thoughts of young ones out there. Sadly, Trolls doesn't get that. Quite possibly, the weakest product ever to emerge from the Dreamworks stable.
1.3/5 stars - DirectorBrady CorbetStarsBérénice BejoLiam CunninghamStacy MartinA chronicle of the childhood of a post-World War I leader.Touted to be a haunting cast study into the makings of some of the most-evil dictators of the 20th century told through the perspective of a young boy; The Childhood of a Leader instead turns out to be nothing more than an overly long and soporific account of a spoiled, whiny brat in need of some stern disciplining and proper parenting, and perhaps, even a good ol' fashioned spanking. It's a pity that one of the best and most-disturbing background scores heard in a long time, comes in a film that will be easily forgotten in a few months. You feel genuinely sorry for composer Scott Walker's talents being put to such sheer waste.
1.3/5 stars - DirectorMartin ButlerBentley DeanStarsMungau DainMarie WawaMarceline RofitSet on a remote Pacific island, covered in rain forest and dominated by an active volcano, this heartfelt story, enacted by the Yakel tribe, tells of a sister's loyalty, a forbidden love affair and the pact between the old ways and the new.Insufferably slow-paced, painfully pointless, and emotionally vapid (criminal for a film with themes ranging from communal discord to star-crossed love); Tanna attempts a novel route by shooting a feature film in the heart of its narrative milieu, and casting real-life people who're part of its subject. But it falls flat in its execution as you're likely to take away from it are a bunch of near-naked people dancing, playing washing clothes, cleaning utensils, cooking food, applying jungle makeup, trying to get laid, and having pagan differences. The true plight of their lives; the deep-rooted patriarchy even in such primitive societies; and the ideological differences between the young and old that can occur regardless of surrounding, lifestyle, or upbringing become nothing than momentary flashes in a disoriented and utterly disjointed narrative.
1.3/5 stars - DirectorSajidFarhad SamjiStarsAkshay KumarAbhishek BachchanRiteish DeshmukhA father doesn't want his three daughters to get married. Now, it's up to three men to try to and convince the father that they're a good fit for his daughters.The gags oscillate between three notes – unfunny, cringe-worthy, and pain-inducing. There are films where the jokes fall flat, and then there’s Housefull 3, which makes you want to break into an impromptu standup comedy act just so that your fellow viewers could leave with some small dose of laughter for the money they’ve paid. Thankfully, the makers have steered clear of homophobic jokes or below-the-belt humor this time. Sadly, they also have seemed to stay away from the jokes, too.
When a Director makes you miss Sajid Khan’s skills, or rather the lack of them, behind the camera, you know that something has gone terribly wrong right from the scripting stage to the final finishing touches. And, just so if you get lured into that pointless argument of leaving your brains at home and just enjoying some brainless entertainment, then ask yourself – how can something be entertaining if it’s already being declared as brainless. Jacqueline, Lisa, Nargis, and Abhishek, and Jackie Shroff wander aimlessly through the entire movie while Akshay, Riteish, and Boman do their best to salvage this mess, but when each line in a comedy fails miserably, the plot is in total shambles, and the jokes are something even six-year olds would find juvenile, then what could expect even good actors to do. Even Aakhri Pasta – one of the highlights of the first two films – makes this one look like an unfunny raasta.
1.4/5 stars - DirectorGreg McLeanStarsKevin BaconRadha MitchellDavid MazouzA family unknowingly awakens an ancient supernatural entity on a Grand Canyon vacation, and must fight for survival when it follows them home.“The Darkness” is so obsessed with being vaguely creepy and so caught up in its delusions of grandeur about making the next-best haunted house movie that it can't be bothered about peripheral distractions like plot development, entertainment, originality, and logic. In his attempt to do all things “Poltergeist”, Director Greg McLean ends up *beep* all over the legacy of the aforementioned classic, going to show that even if you blatantly derive from a superlative film, you need an astute mind with sound judgment at the helm of things. McLean throws everything from CGI phantoms to horrified looks to what's-lurking-behind-the-bend our way, but they all do little to hold our attention. The scariest thing about this scary feature were its misleadingly scary previews. What in the world could have convinced the immensely talented Kevin Bacon to star in this unmitigated, soporific mess?
1.4/5 stars - DirectorStephen ChowStarsChao DengShow LoYuqi ZhangShan, a mermaid, is sent to assassinate Xuan, a developer who threatens the ecosystem of her race, but ends up falling in love with him instead.One of the weirdest films ever made, Stephen Chow’s The Mermaid oscillates between being borderline unwatchable and sweetly enchanting. The problem is that it stagnates in unwatchable territory for far too long during these oscillations. The biggest atrocity that befalls the film is how absurd and downright naive the plotting gets at times, to the point where you actually cringe at yourself for sitting through it. Also, Chow’s idea of humor is way too cheesy and lame. If this is China’s highest-grossing film of all time, then God save Chinese cinema or rather the taste of the country’s movie-going audience. A way superior film better knock The Mermaid off the Chinese pole-position, and it better knock it off fast for the sake of justice and respectability.
1.5/5 stars - DirectorAgneya SinghAban RazaStarsTom AlterRaaghav ChananaIra DubeyA motley crew of university students set out on a journey in pursuit of a mythical form of hash, confronting a series of encounters that begin to unravel the myriad realities of rebellion.The biggest problem with M Cream lies in the indecisiveness of what he wants to show. What begins as a road-trip to find a famed-magical hash in a mystical land whose very existence remains a mystery, keeps making detours to political grievances, activism, rural issues faced by villagers, and stanza after stanza of life lessons being imparted through endless preaching. For a movie about being cool and hip and trippy, M Cream is way too preachy. Everything from the Tibetan crusade to deforestation to Gandhism is touched upon without anything reaching any sort or real purpose. It’s like the kind of reactions you’d expect if you’d try and have a logical discussion with an actual stoner – lots of half-baked replies and topics cut short because of the other party zoning off. If that was the aim of this film, then it certainly scores a home run. But, a movie, unlike a stoner’s life, needs proper direction and purpose, even if it’s based on stoners and hash.
At the end of it all, M Cream scores points for its characters, performances, Mingjue Hu’s cinematography (Dharamsala and its neighboring areas seldom looked this beautiful), and novel concept. However, for a film that touches upon a unique premise, it just comes across as an idea that’s trying to break free from mainstream clutches rather than actually standing out. It’s neither a fun film like Pineapple Express or The Big Lebowski nor does it make pertinent statements like Udta Punjab or Hare Rama Hare Krishna. M Cream just makes a lot of noise without actually saying much.
1.5/5 stars - DirectorIan BonhôteStarsEleanor TomlinsonJohn LynchSam KeeleyWhen bike courier Chris witnesses what looks like a murder, his first instinct is to cut and run. But when his curiosity draws him back in, he's soon embroiled in a world of corruption, political power, and illegal bike racing.Alleycats looks to be a movie tailored to the hipster mentality, and made by, in all probability, a bunch of hipsters. It’s rife with annoying hipster cultural references, and glorification of their overall cynicism, pessimistic attitude, and deliberately niche outlook toward any and everything loved by the general populace. Any amount of professional reasoning or amazement at their skills can’t justify the dangers, which yuppie delivery cyclists put themselves, and more alarmingly, other hardworking everyday folk – who actually contribute to society – at. A half-baked plot along with a bit of suspense is thrown in to treat it as a film, inadvertently and ironically turning it into the very thing that hipsters hate – something that endeavors to cater to what people may like, alas, even that isn’t very likable here. A ray of hope exists courtesy some surprisingly good performances by the young cast, but it isn’t much to find favor with people, who look at life more responsibly.
1.5/5 stars - DirectorJohn LeeStarsPaul ReubensJordan BlackDoug CoxA fateful meeting with a mysterious stranger inspires Pee-wee Herman to take his first holiday ever in this epic story of friendship and destiny.It’s like one of those drab and juvenile “Muppets” or “Scooby-Doo” movies, where you’re happy to see the characters back on screen again, bet get quickly annoyed that the filmmakers forgot to add enough jokes to make it funny or at least some coherent humor for the adults to find it funny along with the kids, especially considering that the core audience would be adults who had watched it when they were kids. The character of Pee-wee Herman is still as startling and original and endearing as he ever was. In fact, I would have given “Pee-wee’s Big Holiday” a 1-star rating was it not for Paul Reubens being charming as ever in the role that made him a household name. He just deserves a funnier, more entertaining holiday to connect with today’s audience and reconnect with the audience who grew up enjoying his simple, innocent, silly brand of laughs that were by no means absurd or off-putting. There’s a difference being silly fun and sheer stupidity.
1.5/5 stars - DirectorAjay DevgnStarsAjay DevgnAbigail EamesErika KaarA skilled mountaineer races against time to rescue his mute daughter from the clutches of human traffickers in Bulgaria.Confusing, sloppy, sluggish, and above all, disjointed – Shivaay is a glossy, lavishly mounted, expensive-looking Diwali cracker that fizzles out the moment it’s lit. You strap in for what you assume to be an exciting dose of popcorn entertainment (as promised by the promos), only to be disappointed by the shabby writing and lethargic direction every step of the way. After a point, you just wish it to end ASAP. Sadly, at almost three hours, even time is not on our side with this film.
From the plotting to the narrative to the dialogues to the action and emotions – everything is equally wayward. Not until an hour into the film are we introduced to the first action sequence – a respectably shot chase scene on a Bulgarian freeway – but by then you’ve been through such an onslaught of forced emotions and needless melodrama that you could hardly care less for however good the action may be.
Shivaay was supposed to be Ajay Devgn’s dream project, which he has spent years developing. Well, he needed to have dreamed bigger, and utilized all that time spent on planning and execution. The tagline of the movie states: ‘This Diwali there will be Destruction’. The film certainly makes good on its promise, though we’re willing to bet that it’s not in the way the makers had intended. In the end, you walk out of the theater with genuine concern over the welfare of your mental faculties.
1.5/5 stars - DirectorAkashdeep SabirStarsBoman IraniVir DasNeha DhupiaTwo friends and their sweet and endearing misadventures and one of these misadventures sees them land in the middle of a kidnapping investigation.There are moments in “Santa Banta Pvt. Ltd.” when you think that you’re in for two hours of harmless fun, where the jokes, though silly, will never fail to tickle your funny bone and put a smile across your face. And, then, there are other moments when you’re left with a puzzled look, wondering why the jokes and gags go from being silly and fun to being irrational and forced. To put it in a nutshell, Santa Banta Pvt. Ltd. is sporadically funny in parts but fails abysmally as a whole comic vehicle.The problems start creeping in when the filmmakers seem to run out of jokes to hold together a 2-hour script, which is when the comedy that was flowing freely begins to stumble, and the jokes that were making us laugh naturally in the beginning barely elicit a few chuckles for the rest of the movie.
Both Boman Irani (Santa) and Vir Das (Banta) do their best to make us enjoy the ride to the very end, but even their impeccable comic timing isn’t enough to conceal those scenes that ask us to laugh instead of making us laugh. “Santa Banta Pvt. Ltd.” may be enjoyed remotely by the kids, but with the kind of access they have to far superior animated children’s fare from Hollywood, I’d doubt that they’d even go for this tripe. Their parents, however, are bound to reject it after the jokes and gags wear thin within the first few scenes itself.
1.5/5 stars - DirectorDivya Khosla KumarStarsRishi KapoorPulkit SamratYami GautamA man focused on his career finds solace when he reunites with his childhood sweetheart.The only good thing that can be said about “Sanam Re” is that the makers have done a fine job of selecting locations and the cinematography appeals to your senses. Besides those factors, the film has absolutely nothing else to appeal to your senses. The music is quite forgettable, the direction is amateurish, the writing pathetic, and the performances are no great shakes either. At least Director Divya Khosla Kumar's debut film, “Yaariyan”, moved along at a decent click even if it was way too clichéd. Here, the pace is so sluggish that you'd might have to pinch yourself to stay awake not even an hour into the movie. Divya Khosla needs to brush up her directing skills quick because her directorial is starting to look more like a holiday package for the entire production team. If you thought that “Sanam Re” is a love story, then it isn't one any sane person would want to experience in their lifetime. This isn't a love story to be watched on Valentine’s Day or any other day for that matter.
1.6/5 stars - DirectorKaran JoharStarsRanbir KapoorAishwarya Rai BachchanAnushka SharmaThis story explores love - the shapes it takes, the ways it changes us and the exhilarating and often terrifying ride it takes us on. It is the journey of two characters, Alizeh and Ayan, as they navigate life, love and heartbreak.Karan Johar has officially lost his mojo because SOTY no longer seems like an aberration after ADHM. Sure he mostly made mushy, candyfloss, feel-good romances and family dramas that seldom mirrored real life (excluding the high-point of his career, My Name is Khan), but at least they gave you a good time at the movies. Well, his last two efforts have been a far cry from anything remotely close to resembling a good time. If SOTY was about how rich kids who can't deal with everyday school issues like normal kids do, then Ae Dil Hai Mushkil is about how a weak, rich, man-child, who can't move past a chick who rejected him, because he was too thick to see it in the first place, when she was friend-zoning him in spite of enjoying his richie-rich benefits. Also, a whole lot of plot contrivances are added, via some blatantly visible coincidences, just so that the story can move forward. Plus, Aishwarya Rai Bachchan springs up - again via a contrivance - to remind you to brush up on your Hindi along with signing up for Urdu lesson. Anushka Sharma is fine but she can't do much with her poorly conceived role. If it wasn't for Ranbir Kapoor's pleasant performance and Shah Rukh Khan's marvelous cameo, then ADHM would have turned out to be unbearable.
1.7/5 stars - DirectorCedric Nicolas-TroyanStarsChris HemsworthJessica ChastainCharlize TheronEric and fellow warrior Sara, raised as members of ice Queen Freya's army, try to conceal their forbidden love as they fight to survive the wicked intentions of both Freya and her sister Ravenna.Three of Hollywood’s most powerful actresses at the moment get lost in a mosaic of bloated visual effects, which is as big as any crime a film could commit. Plus, by cramming far too much material into its 114-minute runtime, “The Huntsman: Winter’s War” feels rushed from the beginning and totally incomplete toward the end. This is the kind of trip they’re referring that makes people gripe about Hollywood’s reliance on sequels and cheap franchise cash-ins, which offer nothing but over-done, run-of-the mill CGI. In fact, if “Huntsman” does anything, it’s expose Chris Hemsworth’s acting shortcomings and seriously question his ability to carry a movie on his shoulders; in short, Hollywood need to do a rethink about banking on him as leading-man material. (He’s good as Thor, but that’s Marvel, which almost sells itself.) On the whole, “The Huntsman: Winter’s War” is an entirely unnecessary sequel to what was already a weak first installment, which did very little in terms of setting up a franchise.
1.7/5 stars - DirectorCan EvrenolStarsMehmet CerrahogluGörkem KasalErgun KuyucuA squad of unsuspecting cops go through a trapdoor to Hell when they stumble upon a Black Mass in an abandoned building.The Turkish horror feature “Baskin” never really involves you in its narrative or characters, and offers very little in the way of genuine scares, ultimately plummeting its initial promise into the depths of repetitively muddled dream sequences. Yes, gore, guts, and grotesque abound, but if anything, they serves as classic representations of a plot that fails abysmally to support the carnage that unfolds onscreen. I've nothing against extreme violence and copious bloodiness; but their indulgence needs to be backed with at least a semblance of purpose.
1.7/5 stars - DirectorShawn ArranhaStarsHimesh ReshammiyaFarah KarimaeeNaseeruddin ShahTara Wadia (Farah Karimaee), a singer and girlfriend of a gangster Raghu (Himesh Reshammiya) lives with her mother (Shernaz Patel). She goes to Dublin where she gets detained after being caught with drugs. Tara calls Raghua for help now Raghu must help her and find Anirudh Brahman, the stranger who met Tara on Facebook and invited her to Ireland.For all its intent to be a slick thriller, “Teraa Surroor” is desperately short on novelty and entertainment. It's merely another yarn of a hero on a rescue mission, in which all the goons he fights in an exotic foreign locale are Indian and it is blatantly obvious that all the action sequences are shot in India, with no attempt made to even disguise it. True to his reputation, Himesh Reshammiya — the only valid reason for “Teraa Surroor’s” existence – does not show any expression; not even one, not even a quarter. Naseeruddin Shah, Shernaz Patel, and Shekhar Kapoor somehow find their way into this tripe, and do whatever they can for it. But, obviously, that’s not enough. The movie is often unintentionally funny, and not something you’d want to waste your precious time on. Now, on paper, the film did look like a neat thriller. However, the execution is marred with umpteen songs, romantic flashbacks, and infinite slow-mo sequences that eventually kill the pace and continuity. Neither suspenseful in its twists and turns, nor breezy in its proceedings, the film seems to exist for no other purpose than to act as a showcase for Himes Bhai and his minimal talent. It’s not the worst Himesh film, but that isn’t saying much considering how low he’s already set the bar.
1.7/5 stars - DirectorRobert EggersStarsAnya Taylor-JoyRalph InesonKate DickieA family in 1630s New England is torn apart by the forces of witchcraft, black magic and possession.Visually, “The Witch” looks damn creepy, and it builds immense atmosphere, but it all peters out well before any significant momentum can be reached. Yes, it’s different from your regular, modern horror movie, but it also fails miserably at capitalizing on being different. Plus, there’s too much of mumbo-jumbo about religion, sin, feminism, and other peripheral stuff going on for the film to get its head out of its own ass. In addition, “The Witch” commits the cardinal cinematic sin of misleading viewers because the trailer and posters sold it as a horror movie, but, in actuality, it’s a somber drama about familial discord and witchcraft. “The Witch” is like a boring, King James version of a horror movie. Many other critics are raving about it, but after watching it, I felt like going home and sitting through a Wes Craven or Dario Argento marathon.
1.8/5 stars - DirectorShujaat SaudagarStarsFarhan AkhtarShraddha KapoorArjun RampalThe band, Magik reunites with some new members.. Every situation in Rock On 2 is a recipe for some past tragedy and everyone is dealing with their personal demons. At one point you do wonder if the band has simply broken up or have they returned from war? Practically every character is a walking-talking cliché, whose arcs and backstories can be seen from a mile away. There’s also the customary self-pity and long-drawn dialogues between the lead actors over how their tortured souls either want to break free or have no chance at redemption. Honestly, these people are so tortured and they wallow in so much self-pity that at some point you simply want to yell and remind them that children are dying from starvation in Africa, Trump has been elected President of the US, and we’re worried about what to do with all our 500 and 1000-rupee notes.
The big reunion that comes at the end tries desperately to evoke memories of the first film’s grand finale but has none of its warmth and sweet embrace. Also, for a film based on a rock band, it’s way too slow, and, more importantly, none of the songs stay with you. Most importantly, it forgets the golden rule of making the audience connect with the characters and their journey as much as they did the first time around. Despite some good dialogues between Farhan Akhtar and Arjun Rampal and also some decent acting from them along with Shashan Arora, this one is still quite tiresome to sit through.
1.8/5 stars - DirectorMilap ZaveriStarsTusshar KapoorVir DasSunny LeoneSunny Kele and Aditya Chothia are two spoiled bachelors who are sex addicts. Their life takes an unexpected turn after they meet twin sisters Lily and Laila who treat sex addicts at their clinic.In an attempt to make a sex-comedy, “Mastizaade” goes extremely overboard and ends up becoming directionless. The film is nothing but an onscreen amalgamation of Wassap jokes, clichéd one-liners, and viral videos. There are scenes here that could give you nightmares – like seeing the septuagenarian Asrani almost bare-clad under a waterfall, or Suresh Menon’s gay caricature that has been done to death and isn’t funny anymore. “Mastizaade” is as pointless as a punctured condom and as ghastly as a bad boob-job. It’s made by a bunch of sweaty sleazeballs intent on exploiting Sunny Leone’s star power and her tasteful sex appeal in an attempt to straight up rob you of your cash. What the filmmakers do is shamelessly and pathetically prey on a certain repressed section of the audience, by serving up an unforgivably brain-dead offering designed to appeal to their most primordial instincts. A sex-comedy is meant to be silly, titillating fun, not unabashedly crass and unapologetically stupid.
1.8/5 stars