- Doctor: Oh, so you've got a kid? Not that there's anything wrong with having a kid. Er, I'm just going to find a surgeon to help me remove my foot from my mouth.
- Nurse: Oh, come on, I didn't want him to know that. You know how funny some people can get.
- Patient: I'm telling you because I'm sick of secrets. I had a transfusion and I got someone else's AIDS!
- Girlfriend: AIDS, you mean like HIV? I think I'll be going now.