- Chris Pontius: I don't know 'bout you, but I'm going to go watch Viva la Bam. I wonder what he'll do to his parents this time?
- Chris Pontius: The bald eagle has the longest life-span of any other bird.
- Steve-O: That's why they're bald.
- Chris Pontius: I was looking at that baboon's wiener and I'm like, "God that's an ugly wiener." And I looked down at mine and I was like, "It kinda looks like mine!"
- Chris Pontius: He uses it for wiping his butt.
- Johnny Knoxville: "The anal claw."
- Steve-O: "Looks like this guy's looking to use his anal claw on me."
- Steve-O: It's the coolest tattoo trick in the world. The guy asks for one tattoo, you give him another