- Ricky: Fuck this court. Fuck Jim Lahey. Fuck Randy. Fuck those two idiot cops right there. Fuck suit dummies; as a matter of fact fuck legal aid. Fuck Danny and Terry's Buffalo Chicken Wings. Fuck all the old wood in here. Fuck the moon, fuck corn on the cob, fuck squirrels. Fuck me, fuck you, fuck everything!
- Bubbles: Delicate Ricky, delicate... Thats blue dye under pressure! That whore blows and we all look like those blue, bald headed dicks that beat the drums.
- [from trailer]
- Bubbles: We're going to have to play ourselves boys. I'm going have to be to be Bubbles in the movie.
- Julian: These people are terrible.
- Ricky: What if I want to be Bubbles?
- Julian: You're going to play yourself. Think, okay. You're going to be Ricky.
- Bubbles: Now you're being a dick right now. You do just that.
- Bubbles: [to Julian, while he's talking to Ricky on his cell phone] Should you be on the phone with him if he's masturbating?
- Bubbles: Boys do you think there's something fucking wrong with ten thousand people seeing us doing this and taking pictures, maybe?
- Ricky: You just gotta make sure the cops don't get your prescription, cause once they have your prescription, you're fucked!