- Chief O'Hara: Look! Up there! Are they birds?
- Commissioner Gordon: Are they planes?
- Batman: No, they're cat-burglars! Quickly, to the elevators!
- Robin: That was the closest call we've ever had, Batman. I have to admit, I was scared.
- Batman: I had no fear whatsoever, Robin.
- Robin: You didn't?
- Batman: Not a bit. Haven't you noticed how we always manage to escape the vicious ensnarements of our underhanded opponents? Don't you know why?
- Robin: Because we're smarter than they are.
- Batman: I prefer to believe it's because our hearts are pure.
- Batman: Catwoman's up there, and she's about to make off with a bundle if we let her.
- Commissioner Gordon: But Batman, we still don't know what she's stealing.
- Batman: Eight pieces of catgut.
- Chief O'Hara: How much could they be worth?
- Batman: Plenty! They're attached to two Stradivarius violins. Each one is being sold today for a quarter of a million dollars.
- Chief O'Hara: I, I'll take me men and we'll run up the 102 flights of stairs.
- Batman: I don't have time for that!
- Jack O'Shea: [referring to Robin the Boy Wonder] Let's can the gabbathon and thrown this rascal out!
- Robin: [Robin is grabbed by Catwoman's catboys] I might have known you were involved! A person like you could give a bad name to gossip columnists!
- Catwoman: Are you Miss Minerva Mathews, the well-known wealthy recluse?
- Minerva Mathews: For lack of a better cognomen, yes, I am!
- Catwoman: How can I ever combat you again after all you've done for me?
- Batman: Let's hope it never comes to that, Catwoman, because, in the end, veracity and rectitude always triumph.
- Catwoman: Batman, are you spoken for?
- Batman: Hmm?
- Catwoman: Married, engaged or going steady?
- Batman: My crime-fighting leaves me little time for social engagements.
- Catwoman: Boy, have I got a girl for you.
- [last lines]
- Robin: I wonder if we've seen the end of her.
- Batman: I wouldn't hazard a guess, Robin.
- Commissioner Gordon: Why, Batman, are you blushing?
- Batman: It's the... heat of the day, Commissioner. Unseasonably warm, don't you think?
- Catwoman: Well... you drive very well, Mr, uh...
- Driver: Staphylococcus.
- Catwoman: Eh?
- Driver: Ralph Staphylococcus. My friend calls me Ralph.
- Catwoman: Ralph, eh? Have you had this job long?
- Driver: Four years next July 22nd, ma'am. I'm studying to be an accountant at night. Can't raise three kids on this salary.
- Catwoman: Oh, you're married? Heh-heh. How nice... for you.