- [Frasier is examining Sam's back after Sam takes a tumble down the stairs]
- Dr. Frasier Crane: Let me see. I don't believe there's a fracture, just a serious sprain around lumbar 3. Does it hurt when I do this?
- [Frasier manipulates Sams back]
- Sam Malone: Ow-ow-ooh.
- Dr. Frasier Crane: That's good, that's good.
- Sam Malone: Why? Does that mean I'm going to get better?
- Dr. Frasier Crane: No, 'cause it means that I know what I'm talking about.
- Dr. Frasier Crane: [to Lilith] You see Lilith, I so could have been a real doctor.