Dempsey and Makepeace (TV Series)

The Squeeze (1985)

Ray Smith: Spikings

Quotes 

• Spikings : [walking towards his office, followed by Makepeace]  I know what you are going to say and the answer is no. You were going to ask in your impeccable Bedale's English whether I would reconsider pairing you with that Yankee Doodle Dandy.

  Makepeace : Look, sir, I can't work with that man...

  Spikings : Harry, I don't want Dempsey in my firm. My Gov'nor don't want him either, But the Home Office have different ideas.

  [quietly] 

  Spikings : And between you and me, who else would I pair him with? That bunch of animals out there? He wouldn't stand much of a chance with them, would he?

• Spikings : [about Dempsey]  Besides, he's only with us for 12 months. Lie back and enjoy it. Think of England.

• Spikings : Oh, by the way, Dempsey...

  [Dempsey turns around in the door] 

  Spikings : May I?

  [Spikings holds out his hand] 

  Dempsey : May you what?

  Spikings : May I have that piece of artillery that's solely dislocating your left shoulder?

  [Dempsey hesitates] 

  Spikings : It's not necessary, it's against the law and it'll ruin the cut of your jacket.

• Spikings : Dempsey, when the prime minister and the home secretary instructed me to set up this special unit to combat major crime, I did not expect to be wet nursing ex vietnam soldiers touting bazooka's.

• Spikings : [on phone in office]  By the way, how is the great American disaster?

  Makepeace : [on other line]  A long way up my nose.

• Spikings : [to Makepeace]  Go and pick up Cagney or Lacey or whatever his name is, will you? Bring him in, he's late.

• [Spikings notices that Dempsey and Makepeace are not around] 

  Spikings : [to the other cops]  Where's Batman and Robin?