- Romana: [looking at the green bracelet the Doctor stole from a woman in the gallery] It's a micromeson scanner.
- The Doctor: That's right. She was using it to get a complete report on all the alarm systems around the Mona Lisa.
- Romana: Do you mean she was trying to steal it?
- The Doctor: It is very a pretty painting.
- Romana: It's a very sophisticated device for a level five civilisation.
- The Doctor: That? That's never the product of Earth's civilisation.
- Romana: Do you mean an alien's trying to steal the Mona Lisa?
- The Doctor: It is a very pretty painting.
- [Two men with guns have just forced the Doctor to hand over the green bracelet]
- Romana: Are you all right?
- The Doctor: Yes, I'm just relaxing and enjoying Paris.
- Duggan: All right, that's enough. Very cleverly staged, but you don't fool me.
- The Doctor: What are you talking about?
- Duggan: Your men who were in here just now.
- The Doctor: My men? Those thugs?
- Duggan: Your thugs.
- The Doctor: Are you suggesting those men were in my employ?
- Duggan: Yes.
- The Doctor: I don't know if you noticed but he was pointing a gun at me. Anyone in my employ who behaved like that, I'd sack him on the spot.
- The Doctor: [on the Eiffel Tower] Nice, isn't it?
- Romana: Yes, marvellous.
- The Doctor: Marvellous. Absolutely.
- Romana: Absolutely marvellous.
- The Doctor: Well, I think it's marvelous.
- Romana: So do I. Though it's not quite as you described it.
- The Doctor: Really? How did I describe it?
- Romana: Well, you said it was nice.
- The Doctor: It's the only place in the Universe where one can relax entirely.
- Romana: Mmm... That bouquet!
- The Doctor: What Paris has, it has an ethos... a life... It has...
- Romana: A bouquet?
- The Doctor: A spirit all of its own. Like a wine, it has...
- Romana: A bouquet.
- The Doctor: It has a bouquet. Yeah. Like a good wine. You have to chose one of the vintage years, of course.
- Romana: What year is this?
- The Doctor: Ah, well... well, it's 1979, actually. More of a table wine, shall we say? Ha! A randomizer is a useful device, but it lacks true discrimination. Shall we sip it and see?
- Romana: Oh, I'd be delighted. Should we take the lift or fly?
- The Doctor: Let's not be ostentatious.
- Romana: All right, let's fly, then.
- The Doctor: That would look silly. We'll take the lift, come on.
- First Jagaroth: Twenty soneds to warp thrust.
- Scaroth: Confirmed.
- 2nd Jagaroth: Thrust against planet surface set to power three.
- Scaroth: Negative. Power three too severe.
- 2nd Jagaroth: Scaroth, it must be power three. It must be.
- Scaroth: Warp thrust from planet surface is untested. At power three, it is suicide. Advised.
- First Jagaroth: Ten soneds to warp thrust.
- Scaroth: Advise!
- 2nd Jagaroth: The Jagaroth are in your hands. Without secondary engines we must use our main warp thrust. You know this, Scaroth. It is our only hope. You are our only hope.
- Scaroth: And I am the only one directly in the warp field! I know the dangers.
- First Jagaroth: Three, two, one...
- Scaroth: What will happen if...
- First Jagaroth: ...full power.
- [the spaceship takes off]
- 2nd Jagaroth: Help us, Scaroth, Help us! The fate of the Jagaroth is with you. Help us, Scaroth! You are our only hope! Our only hope! Help us! Scaroth! Scaroth! The Jagaroth! The Jagaroth!
- [the spaceship explodes]
- Romana: Where are we going?
- The Doctor: Are you talking philosophically or geographically?
- Romana: Philosophically.
- The Doctor: Then we're going to lunch. I know a little place that does a wonderful bouillabaisse. Do you like bouillabaisse?
- Romana: Mmm, bouillabaisse, yum-yum.
- Count: That Gainsborough didn't fetch enough. I think we'll have to sell one of the bibles.
- Hermann: Sir?
- Count: Yes. The Gutenberg.
- Hermann: May I suggest we tread more carefully, sir? It would not be in our best interest to draw too much attention to ourselves. Another rash of priceless treasures on the market...
- Count: Yes, I know, Herman, I know. Just sell it discreetly.
- Hermann: Discreetly, sir? Sell a Gutenberg Bible discreetly?
- Count: Well, as discreetly as possible. Just do it, will you?
- Hermann: Yes, sir.
- The Doctor: Don't move! You might spoil a priceless work of art.
- Romana: What?
- The Doctor: That man over there. Don't look.
- Romana: What's he doing?
- The Doctor: Shh...
- Romana: [whispering] What's he doing?
- The Doctor: He's sketching you.
- Romana: Is he?
- [she turns around, the artist grumpily crumples the sketch up and throws it to the floor and leaves]
- The Doctor: I told you not to look.
- Romana: I just wanted to see.
- The Doctor: It's too late. He's gone now.
- Romana: Pity, I wonder what he thought I looked like.
- The Doctor: Well, he threw it down there. Let's have a look...
- The Doctor: You and I exist in a special relationship to time, you know. Perpetual outsiders.
- Romana: Don't be so... portentous.
- Romana: Well, at least on Gallifrey we can capture a good likeness. Computers can draw.
- The Doctor: What? Computer pictures... You sit in Paris and talk of computer pictures? Listen, I'll take you somewhere and show you some real paintings painted by real people.
- Romana: What about the time slip?
- The Doctor: Never mind about the time slip. We're on holiday. Come on!
- The Doctor: You know, I think something very funny's going on. You remember that man that was following us?
- Romana: Yes.
- The Doctor: Well, he's standing behind me, poking a gun in my back.
- [In the Lourve, the Doctor experiences another strange sensation of time repeating itself. He staggers and collapses and a crowd gathers]
- Duggan: All right, stand back. Stand back, everybody, stand back. Are you all right, sir?
- [the Doctor tries to stand up and bumps his head into the man's torso]
- The Doctor: Yes. I just dented my head on your gun, that's all.
- Romana: Don't take any notice of him. He's just having one of his funny turns.
- The Doctor: One of my funny turns? The whole world took a funny turn.
- Duggan: What's Scarlioni's angle?
- The Doctor: Scarlioni's angle? I've never heard...
- [to Romana]
- The Doctor: Have you ever heard of Scarlioni's angle?
- Romana: No, I was never any good at geometry.
- The Doctor: [to Duggan] Who's Scarlinoi?
- Duggan: Count Scarlioni. Everyone on Earth's heard of Count Scarlioni.
- The Doctor: Ah, well, we've only just landed on Earth.
- The Doctor: There we are, the Louvre. One of the greatest art galleries in the whole galaxy.
- Romana: Nonsense! What about the Academia Stellaris on Sirius Five?
- The Doctor: What? Oh no. No, no.
- Romana: Or the Solarian Pinaquotheque at Strikian?
- The Doctor: Oh, no, no.
- Romana: Or the Braxiatel Collection?
- The Doctor: No, no, no, no, no, no. This is the gallery. The only gallery in the known universe which a picture like...
- [cut to inside the gallery]
- The Doctor: The Mona Lisa.
- Romana: It's quite good.
- The Doctor: Quite good? That's one of the great treasures of the universe and you say quite good?
- Romana: The world, Doctor, the world.
- The Doctor: What are you talking about?
- Romana: Not the universe in public, Doctor. It only calls attention.
- The Doctor: I don't care. It's one of the great treasures of the universe!
- Romana: Shh.
- The Doctor: I don't care, let them gawp, let them gape. What do I care?