Doctor Who (TV Series)

The Empty Child (2005)

John Barrowman: Jack Harkness

Photos 

Quotes 

• Rose Tyler : So, who are you supposed to be then?

  Captain Jack Harkness : [handing her a card]  Captain Jack Harkness, 133 Squadron, Royal Air Force. American volunteer.

  Rose Tyler : Liar. This is psychic paper. It tells me whatever you want it to tell me.

  Captain Jack Harkness : How do you know?

  Rose Tyler : Two things. One, I have a friend that uses this all the time, and two, you just handed me a piece of paper telling me you're single and you work out.

  Captain Jack Harkness : Tricky thing, psychic paper.

  Rose Tyler : Yeah. Can't let your mind wander when you're handing it over.

  Captain Jack Harkness : [reading the paper she's just handed back]  Oh, you sort of have a boyfriend called Mickey Smith, but you consider yourself to be footloose and fancy-free.

  Rose Tyler : What?

  Captain Jack Harkness : Actually the word you use is "available".

  Rose Tyler : No way.

  Captain Jack Harkness : And another one, "very".

• Captain Jack Harkness : So... when you say 'your companion', how disappointed should I be?

  Rose Tyler : OK. We're standing in mid-air on a space-ship during a German air-raid. Do you really think now's a good time to be coming on to me?

  Captain Jack Harkness : Perhaps not.

  Rose Tyler : It was just a suggestion.

• Captain Jack Harkness : So, this companion of yours. Does he handle the business?

  Rose Tyler : Well... I delegate a lot of that, yeah.

  Captain Jack Harkness : Well, maybe we should go find him.

  Rose Tyler : And how you gonna do that?

  Captain Jack Harkness : Easy. I'll just scan for alien tech.

  Rose Tyler : Finally, a professional.

• Rose Tyler : You used to be a Time Agent. Now... you're some kind of freelancer.

  Captain Jack Harkness : Oh, that's a little harsh. I like to think of myself as a criminal.

• Captain Jack Harkness : [Rose falls from the barrage balloon rope but is caught by a beam of light. Captain Jack speaks to her via loudspeaker]  I'm just programming your descent pattern. Stay still as you can and keep your hands and feet inside the light field.

  Rose Tyler : Descent pattern?

  Captain Jack Harkness : [via loudspeaker]  Oh, and could you switch off your cell-phone?

  [Rose starts to complain] 

  Captain Jack Harkness : No, seriously, it interferes with my instruments.

  Rose Tyler : You know, no one ever believes that.

  [switches phone off] 

  Captain Jack Harkness : [via loudspeaker]  Thank you, that's much better.

  Rose Tyler : Oh yeah, that's a real load off, that is! I'm hanging in the sky in the middle of a German air raid with a Union Jack across my chest but, hey, my mobile phone's off!

• [on the Doctor and Rose's outfits] 

  Captain Jack Harkness : Oh, should've known, the way you guys are blending in with the local colour. I mean, Flag Girl was bad enough, but U-boat Captain?

• Captain Jack Harkness : Go back to what you were doing.

  The Doctor : We were talking about dancing.

  Captain Jack Harkness : Didn't look like talking

  Rose Tyler : Didn't feel like dancing.

• Rose Tyler : You have an invisible spaceship.

  Captain Jack Harkness : Yeah.

  Rose Tyler : Tethered up to Big Ben for some reason.

  Captain Jack Harkness : First rule of active camouflage: Park somewhere you remember.

• [Jack watches the action from a balcony, and gets transfixed on Rose through his binoculars] 

  Officer : Get those lights out please!

  [they start clearing out] 

  Officer : Come on, down to the shelter.

  Algy : Jack? Are you going down to the shelter? Only, I've got to go off on some silly guard duty.

  [Jack spots Rose] 

  Algy : Ah! Barrage Balloon, eh? Must've come loose. Happens now and then. Don't you RAF boys use them for target practice?

  Captain Jack Harkness : [zooms in on Rose's crotch, which is visible due to her pants starting to come off]  Excellent bottom!

  Algy : I say, old man. There's a time and a place. Look - you should really be off.

  Captain Jack Harkness : Sorry, old man.

  [laughs, goes inside] 

  Captain Jack Harkness : I've gotta go and meet a girl. But you've got an excellent bottom too.

  [He slaps Algy's bottom on the way out to emphasise this point. Algy looks rather pleased] 

• Captain Jack Harkness : I've got you. You're fine, you're just fine. The tractor beam, it can scramble your head just a little.

  Rose Tyler : Hello.

  Captain Jack Harkness : Hello.

  Rose Tyler : Hello. Sorry, there was 'hello' twice there. Dull, but, you know, thorough.

  Captain Jack Harkness : Are you all right?

  Rose Tyler : I'm fine! Why, you expecting me to faint?

  Captain Jack Harkness : You look a little dizzy.

  Rose Tyler : What about you? You're not even in focus...! Oh, boll...

  [faints] 

• Captain Jack Harkness : It's 1941. The height of the London Blitz. The height of the German bombing campaign. But something else has fallen on London, a fully-equipped Chula warship. The last one in existence, armed to the teeth. And I know where it is. Because I parked it. If the Agency can name the right price, I can get it for you. But in two hours, a German bomb is gonna fall on it and destroy it forever. That's your deadline. That's the deal. Now, shall we discuss payment?

• Captain Jack Harkness : Saw your time-travel vehicle. Love the retro look, by the way. Nice panels.