Family Matters (TV Series)
Torn Between Two Lovers (1990)
Jaleel White: Steve Urkel
Quotes
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[Steve thinks Rachel is in love with him, but she is really in love with another man named Steve]
Rachel Crawford : Oh, hi Steve.
[Steve jumps]
Rachel Crawford : How are you?
Steve Urkel : Mm-fine!
Rachel Crawford : Uh, Steve, would you mind coming over to the restaurant on Sunday at about 7:30?
Steve Urkel : A-wha-ha-wha-wha-wha-wah?
Rachel Crawford : Well, I'm planning dinner for a very, very special friend.
Steve Urkel : Oh, I see. Oh, I see. I-I-I see.
Rachel Crawford : Steve, are you sure you're okay?
[Goes to feel his head]
Steve Urkel : [Runs across the couch to get away] Fine, fine, fine!
Rachel Crawford : Good. Look, Steve. I wanna play some of my own records on the jukebox, but I don't know how to put them in. Can you help me out?
Steve Urkel : Do I have to?
Rachel Crawford : Well, Steve, I am your boss. But, I'd be willing to pay you.
Steve Urkel : [Takes it the wrong way] Gee... I wouldn't know what to charge.
Rachel Crawford : How 'bout double the usual?
Steve Urkel : The usual? Well... oh-okay.
Rachel Crawford : Thanks Steve. You know what? You are such a sweetheart. Come here.
[Pulls him into a hug]
Rachel Crawford : [He faints]
Rachel Crawford : Steve? Steve, what happened?
Steve Urkel : Oh, nothing. Just blacked out for a second there!
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[Steve comes out of the freezer at Rachel's Place shivering]
Rachel Crawford : Honey, how long were you in there?
Steve Urkel : L-long enough to get i-icicles on my nose hair... Look!
Rachel Crawford : I'll just take your word for it.