- Mike McNeill: Look, Tino, we're not looking for information, okay? We got a call this morning somebody found a foot in a bag outside an apartment building and we want to know if it means anything.
- Tino: Yeah, it means you got a foot in a bag.
- Mike McNeill: You don't know anybody who would do something like that?
- Tino: Nah, it's a lot of work cutting off a foot. Then you gotta find a bag.
- Frank Harrigan: Uh, he's a foot doctor.
- Podiatrist: Excuse me, I'm a podiatrist.
- Frank Harrigan: I had an uncle who was a foot doctor, nice guy. Then one day my aunt comes home and there he is in the bedroom being spanked by some big guy in leather. There's a lot of people out there that, you know, nothing gets them going like a good crack in the ass.
- [pause]
- Frank Harrigan: Somebody else jump in here.
- Frank Harrigan: Thinks he's a big shot podiatrist... you don't even have to go to medical school for that. You work in a shoe store long enough you're almost a podiatrist.
- Mike McNeill: So what do we think?
- Frank Harrigan: Oh, about this?
- Mike McNeill: Yeah.
- Frank Harrigan: I don't know, maybe a mob thing.
- Mike McNeill: Really? Well, I'll ask Tino, but they usually don't leave a foot. They, they dump a whole body, you know.
- Frank Harrigan: Well, maybe he's a new guy working his way up to a whole body, you know - things go good with the foot. Either that or we're looking for a guy with a really bad limp.
- Mike McNeill: We got a call this morning. Somebody found a foot in a bag outside an apartment building, we want to know if it means anything.
- Tino: Yeah, means you got a foot in a bag.
- Mike McNeill: You don't know anybody who'd do something like that?
- Mike McNeill: Nah. It's a Lotta work cutting off a foot. Then you gotta find a bag. Jimmie Nipples, you know him?
- Mike McNeill: Jimmie Nipples?
- Tino: Yeah, used to have five nipples right here - bing, bing, bing, bing. He used to cut guy's fingers off. But that's a finger, small - snip, snip, you're done.
- Mike McNeill: What'd I tell you? Told you he was bad.
- Terrence 'Pip' Phillips: What?
- Mike McNeill: Okay. Strike one: He's a lawyer. Strike two: He spent time in rehab. And strike three: Get this, he's married. You believe this guy? Married.
- Terrence 'Pip' Phillips: Well, let's see. My married partner just got off the phone with his girlfriend. Now he's upset because she couldn't score the Tylenol with the codeine. No, I don't believe that guy.
- Mike McNeill: So now we got two feet.
- Frank Harrigan: Two left feet.
- Tommy Manetti: So we know they're not from the same person.
- Frank Harrigan: Hey, this Kline guy is flipping out. He says these feet are bad for his business. He says this keeps up his practice is gonna go in the toilet.
- Terrence 'Pip' Phillips: Yeah, who's going to a foot doctor with a bunch of dead feet out front?
- Mike McNeill: Hey, at this point I'm just glad the guy's not a urologist, you know what I mean?
- Terrence 'Pip' Phillips: You got a wife, a girlfriend, now you're getting a thing for Jan? At this rate, next you'll be hitting on me.