- Jim Rockford: This is Jim Rockford. At the tone leave your name and message, I'll get back to you.
- Teddy's Tree House Employee: [beeep] Teddy's Tree House! You've won our free landscaping service for one full year! We'll mow your lawn, top your trees, mulch, seed, fertilize and feed! Isn't that wonderful!
- Jim Rockford: [sarcastically speaking of Clementi] I remember somebody saying that the corpses would be found near a body of water. This place is practically the Gobi Desert.
- Roman Clementi: Sergeant? Mister Rockford?
- [He points uphill toward a reservoir]
- Jim Rockford: Are you kidding me? Water tanks don't count!