Roseanne (TV Series)

Home Is Where the Afghan Is (1996)

Estelle Parsons: Beverly Harris

Quotes 

• Beverly Harris : And he's not the only man like that! They're all cut from the same cloth.Which is why I don't particularly care for men! Frankly, to sleep with a man is to know how much you hate them! By the end of my marriage, the only way I could have sex with my husband was if I stopped off at the store and bought myself a Playboy first!

  [looks shocked at what she just said] 

  Darlene Conner-Healy : [after several reaction shots]  Well, I think Grandma's just outed herself!

  D.J. Conner : Oh God!

  [covers his face] 

  Nana Mary : I've always know it since she's a little girl. She always liked flannel.

• Beverly Harris : I would like to give thanks that I am not a young child being raised by two very tasteful but nonetheless light in the loafers...

  Roseanne Conner : Mom! Mom! Look around you! Nobody's talking about that anymore!

  Beverly Harris : I just don't think two men should raise a child. I married a man! He was cruel to my children and cheated on me, he had horrible table manners and he made me drive an old car with bald tires! The bastard!

  Roseanne Conner : Mother! Try to save a little something for Christmas!

• Beverly Harris : I brought a Jell-O mold with kiwis.

  Jackie Harris : Mother, we have caterers preparing the food this year.

  Beverly Harris : Did any of them make a Jell-O mold?

  Jackie Harris : No.

  Beverly Harris : Then I guess somebody should say 'thank you mother'!

  Roseanne Conner : Go ahead, Jimmy.

  Caterer : [mocking Bev]  Thank you mother!