- Dan Conner: Prepare yourself for a treat... let the romance begin.
- Roseanne: [Dan hands her a videotape] "Romancing the Bone"?
- Dan Conner: Yeah, I figured we could pop it in for a few minutes, watch it, and then, you know...
- Roseanne: Then what? Barf?
- Dan Conner: I did something wrong, didn't I?
- Roseanne: No, Dan, you just did everything wrong. This is nothing but disgusting, pornographic filth.
- Dan Conner: It's got "romance" in the title.
- Roseanne: It's just some sicko male fantasy that only appeals to other sicko males.
- Dan Conner: It can't be just for men. It's got scenes with only women.