Quotes
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David Healy : Do you want me to start calling you Mom?
Roseanne Conner : No. I'd like the other kids to start calling me Mrs. Conner.
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Roseanne Conner : Calm down. It's not like he ate the last piece of pie or nothin'.
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David Healy : Something's wrong with me, I'm sick!
Roseanne Conner : No, David, you're not sick, you're a perfectly normal teenage boy, though I can understand how you could confuse the two.
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David Healy : I feel a lot better about all this.
Roseanne Conner : I'm glad to hear it, so... can I get a hug, or do I have to get you drunk first?
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Dan Conner : If he's dreaming about it, he's going to be trying to make it happen.
Roseanne Conner : Oh yeah, that reminds me, I better get down to the supermarket so I can walk around naked.
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Beverly Harris : I said when you bought this house that you'd have trouble with the pipes.
Roseanne Conner : Yeah, and 20 years later it happens... eerie.
