- Guthrie Featherstone, QC MP: [after realizing he has missed his bus] I shouldn't have stood here chattering to you, Rumpole. I must be a complete idiot.
- Horace Rumpole: [after Featherstone runs for a taxi] Is that a confession we can accept as the truth, my lord?
- Marigold Featherstone: You've got absolutely no judgment, Guthrie. It must come as something of a drawback in your profession.
- Horace Rumpole: There is no evidence more unreliable than a confession. Don't imagine people ever tell the truth about themselves.
- [Rumpole has just got back from the supermarket]
- Horace Rumpole: Your sugar, Madam.
- Hilda Rumpole: Sugar, for a baked pudding.
- Horace Rumpole: Excellent. I relish the Rumpole roly-poly.
- Hilda Rumpole: [disdainfully] Rumpole, this sugar is in lumps. What am I suppose to do? Jump up and down on it?
- Horace Rumpole: Well, do your best.