Seinfeld (TV Series)
The Marine Biologist (1994)
Julia Louis-Dreyfus: Elaine Benes
Quotes
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Elaine Benes : [talking with Lippman and Testikow in the limo about "War and Peace"] Although one wonders if "War and Peace" would have been as highly acclaimed as it was if it was published under its original name "War: What Is It Good For?"
Lippman : What?
Elaine Benes : Yes, Mr. Lippman. It was his mistress who insisted he called it "War and Peace." "War - What Is It Good For"
[singing]
Elaine Benes : Absolutely nothin'!
[speaking to Testikov]
Elaine Benes : The song got that line got from Tolstoy.
Lippman : I'm sorry. It's just her sense of humor.
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Jerry : [after Elaine mentions Tolstoy] Hey, you know what? I read the most unbelievable thing about Tolstoy the other day. Did you know the original title for "War and Peace" was "War - What Is It Good For?"
Elaine Benes : Ha, ha.
Jerry : No, no. I'm not kidding, Elaine. It's true. His mistress didn't like the title and insisted him change it to "War and Peace".
Elaine Benes : But it's a line from that song.
Jerry : That's were they got it from.
Elaine Benes : Really?
Jerry : I'm not joking.
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Jerry : [opening scene: In Jerry's apartment, Jerry is at the table and Elaine is on the phone] Elaine, see these t-shirts? Six years I've had this t-shirt. It's my best one. I call it... Golden Boy.
Elaine Benes : I'm on the phone here.
Jerry : Golden Boy is always the first shirt I wear out of the laundry. Here - touch Golden Boy!
Elaine Benes : No, thanks.
[to the phone]
Elaine Benes : Yeah, yeah - I'll hold.
Jerry : But, see - look at the collar. See, it's fraying; Golden Boy is slowly dying. Each wash brings him one step closer. That's what makes the t-shirt such a tragic figure.
Elaine Benes : Why don't you just let Golden Boy soak in the sink with some Woolite?
Jerry : No! The reason he's iron man is because he goes out there and plays every game. Wash! Spin! Rinse! Spin! You take that away from him, you break his spirit!
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Elaine Benes : [Closing scene as they leave the restaurant] Are you in a bad mood?
Jerry : No, I just got my laundry back.
Elaine Benes : Ohhh. Golden Boy?
Jerry : He didn't make it.
Elaine Benes : I'm sorry.
Jerry : This is Golden Boy's son, Baby Blue.
[Elaine rolls her eyes]