Xena: Warrior Princess (TV Series)

Succession (1999)

Kevin Smith: Ares

Quotes 

• Ares, God of War : Considering all you've been through.

  Gabrielle : [draws her sais]  Ares, whatever you're looking for, look somewhere else!

  Ares, God of War : Do I always have to be after something? You've been away awhile. Maybe I missed you. Maybe I'm trying to help...

  Gabrielle : You only help yourself.

  Ares, God of War : Aw, ultimately that is true but it doesn't mean I don't understand. Here, let me take a shot at this. Uh, Xena has been overprotective of you. She's been treatin' you like you're still...

  Gabrielle : They were five bandits, five of them! She could have handled four and I would have been happy with just one. But no, no, she had to take them all!

  Ares, God of War : It is hard to shed your perceptions of a person...

  Gabrielle : [picks up her sais]  I'm tired of it!

  Ares, God of War : Hey, I notice you're gettin' pretty good with those!

  Gabrielle : At least someone noticed. So Xena doesn't appreciate that I've been practicing. It's...

  Gabrielle : [Mavican appears]  Who are you?

  Mavican : The name is Mavican. I'm looking for Xena.

  Gabrielle : What do you want with her?

  Mavican : I wanna kill her and I understand that killing you is the best way to meet her!

• Ares, God of War : Hey! Just stop it! Stop it right now!

  [column falls and Ares looks outraged] 

  Ares, God of War : What in the name of me do you think you're doing?

  Mavican : Getting your attention!

  Ares, God of War : By destroying Demeter's temple? No. See, destroying temples in the name of other gods, we just don't do it.

  Mavican : Who cares about her? I'll destroy a thousand of her temples if I have to! I told you I was good. Tell him! Tell him how good I am, Xena!

  Xena : Good enough to die young.

• Ares, God of War : Course, if anyone wants my help, all she's gotta do is call!

• Xena : I don't get it, Ares. All this just to see your new girlfriend fight?

  Ares, God of War : No. Watch my old girlfriend fight. I missed it.

• Mavican : Ares! Ares! Help me! Help me!

  Ares, God of War : Mavican, are you asking for my help?

  Mavican : Yes, I'm asking for your help, God of War!

  Xena : She's asking for your help.

  [Xena looks triumphant. Ares opens the portal home and Xena jumps through] 

  Mavican : What are you doing, Ares? You said I could ask!

  Ares, God of War : Yeah, I said you could. I never said you should.

• Gabrielle : You said anyone could ask for your help.

  Xena : Years ago, Ares said to me that anyone who asks for his help doesn't deserve it. So when Mavican asked...

  Gabrielle : She lost.

  Ares, God of War : I really gotta be more careful with my riddles.