The Young Ones (TV Series)

Bomb (1982)

Nigel Planer: Neil, Dino, Fly #2

Photos 

Quotes 

• Neil : I won't say anything because no one ever listens to me anyway. I might as well be a Leonard Cohen record.

• Mike TheCoolPerson : Twenty-seven minutes and thirty-two seconds in the bathroom and Mike looks fantastic. Unlike the kitchen! Neil, what's this mess?

  Neil Pye : Well, it's mostly lentils, but there's some crockery mixed in.

• Neil : [after kettle blows up]  It's as if the kettle's killed itself rather than be used by me.

• Right Bleeding Bastard : Where's your toilet?

  Neil : Upstairs, just follow your nose.

• Vyvyan : [about the person at the door]  It's probably someone unbelievably boring.

  Neil : [Upon discovering who's at the door]  Oh no! It's the TV detector man!

  Rick : MIKE, YOU BASTARD! Why didn't you buy a license? I can't go to prison, I'm too pretty, I'll get raped!

• Neil : [talking to a spade]  You're a spade.

  [pauses] 

  Neil : I always call him that.

• Neil : [after all the lentils spill out of the cupboard]  We'll have to have corn flakes.

  Vyvyan : Corn flakes for breakfast? That's disgusting, Neil!

• Neil : If I had a penny for every time I had to answer the door, I'd have £5.63

• Vyvyan : Good morning, Neil. Tea ready yet, is it?

  Neil : Shh! The kettle's had a breakdown.

  Vyvyan : Oh, no! That means we'll have to have raw tea again!