The Young Ones (TV Series)

Oil (1982)

Adrian Edmondson: Vyvyan

Photos 

Quotes 

• Vyvyan : [Rick and Vyvyan are arguing over who gets which room in their new house]  This is my room!

  Rick : No, it's my room!

  Vyvyan : [Dumps a bin liner full of his clothes on the bed]  No! See? It must be my room, cause all my clothes are here!

  Rick : [after picking the clothes up and throwing them up out the window]  No they're not, Vyvyan!

  [Vyvyan strikes a match and lights the bed on fire] 

  Rick : Oh, that's just perfect, now what are we going to do?

  Vyvyan , Rick : [Rushing out of the room]  Neil! Your bedroom's on fire!

  Neil : [Coming out of a room]  Huh? Which one's mine?

  [Sees flaming bed] 

  Neil : Oh no!

• Mike : It's nice to have a front door.

  Vyvyan : We had a front door in the last house.

  Rick : Yes, Vyvyan, but it was nailed to the ceiling in the living room!

• Rick : Why did you throw the toilet out of the window?

  Vyvyan Basterd : To lower the rent.

  Rick : Of course, stupid old me. Just one other thing, what are you talking about?

  Vyvyan Basterd : Now we can go to the rent tribunal, you don't have to pay as much for a house with an outside lavvy.

  Rick : Really... Well I don't believe you, I think you did it on purpose because you know I've got a runny bottom!

  Vyvyan Basterd : Look, is Neil going to make the supper or not?

  Rick : I think you'd better ask him that have you, I'm a bit more interested in my bottom at the moment!

• Vyvyan : I was in the basement, playing my favorite game, 'Murder In The Dark.'

• Vyvyan : Neil! Are you gonna come down and make breakfast or am I have to going to kick your teeth in?

• Vyvyan Basterd : This is revolting.

  Rick : You know, it is amazing what you can come up with with just flour and water.

  Vyvyan Basterd : Yeah. Glue.

• Neil : I thought we all agreed that if we went to the laundrette we would take everyone's dirty gear? Let's look in the People's Charter. Right, here it is. No one, right, even if they've been eaten by wild dogs, right, will go to the launderette without first collecting everyone else's dirty gear.

  Vyvyan : That's my clause!

  Mike : Right, now clause 83?

  Neil : Oh... except for Mike.

• Vyvyan : Alright, Neil, I'm gonna give you three seconds to make supper... starting NOW!

  Neil : Three seconds?

  [Starts trying to make supper] 

  Vyvyan : [Moves towards the dinner table once]  One.

  [Moves towards the dinner table a second time] 

  Vyvyan : TWO!

  Neil : [Gotten a couple pans]  What do you fancy, Vyv?

  Vyvyan : THREE! Where's my supper?

• Vyvyan : [Vyvyan shouts upstairs]  Neil! NEIL! Let's not beat about the bush! Are you gonna make supper, or am I gonna kick your teeth in?