The Young Ones (TV Series)

Oil (1982)

Rik Mayall: Rick

Photos 

Quotes 

• Vyvyan : [Rick and Vyvyan are arguing over who gets which room in their new house]  This is my room!

  Rick : No, it's my room!

  Vyvyan : [Dumps a bin liner full of his clothes on the bed]  No! See? It must be my room, cause all my clothes are here!

  Rick : [after picking the clothes up and throwing them up out the window]  No they're not, Vyvyan!

  [Vyvyan strikes a match and lights the bed on fire] 

  Rick : Oh, that's just perfect, now what are we going to do?

  Vyvyan , Rick : [Rushing out of the room]  Neil! Your bedroom's on fire!

  Neil : [Coming out of a room]  Huh? Which one's mine?

  [Sees flaming bed] 

  Neil : Oh no!

• Mike : It's nice to have a front door.

  Vyvyan : We had a front door in the last house.

  Rick : Yes, Vyvyan, but it was nailed to the ceiling in the living room!

• Rick : Why did you throw the toilet out of the window?

  Vyvyan Basterd : To lower the rent.

  Rick : Of course, stupid old me. Just one other thing, what are you talking about?

  Vyvyan Basterd : Now we can go to the rent tribunal, you don't have to pay as much for a house with an outside lavvy.

  Rick : Really... Well I don't believe you, I think you did it on purpose because you know I've got a runny bottom!

  Vyvyan Basterd : Look, is Neil going to make the supper or not?

  Rick : I think you'd better ask him that have you, I'm a bit more interested in my bottom at the moment!

• Rick : Im not sharing a bedroom with THAT rubber johnny! Allright Neil, Shut up. Before you say anything I just tossed a coin for who gets the bed and you lost. It's completely fair and if you don't believe me, ask Mike

  Neil : [Despondently]  Oh, uh. Okay Rick

  [Audience "Awws] 

  Rick : What?

  Neil : What?

  Rick : What did you just say?

  Neil : Huh?

  Rick : You just called me a Bastard didn't you!

• [Vyvyan hits Rick in the crotch with a cricket bat because he interrupted Mike] 

  Rick : Ha, ha, missed both my legs.

• Vyvyan Basterd : This is revolting.

  Rick : You know, it is amazing what you can come up with with just flour and water.

  Vyvyan Basterd : Yeah. Glue.

• Rick : What is that little white dot?

  Neil Pye : It's a little white dot.

  Rick : Oh very clever.

  Neil Pye : Must be really old telly.

  Rick : What, hippie?

  Neil Pye : It's a sign, that little white dot. It means something really heavy. It means there's no more telly, it's time to go to bed.