Danger Mouse (TV Series)

DM on the Orient Express (1986)

David Jason: Danger Mouse, The Narrator

Photos 

Quotes 

• Danger Mouse : Look, who's at the back of this racket?

  Foreman : I'm not at liberty to say, sir.

  [turns round, revealing a company name on the back of his jacket] 

  Foreman : Right, get ready to haul that concrete!

  Danger Mouse : [reading the logo on the jacket]  Greenback Construction company. Aha, so that's who's at the jack of this bucket. Eh, back of this jacket, racket. I should have known.

  Penfold : Well I told you to read the script.

• Baron Silas Greenback : This document gives it's owner the legal right to build anything, anywhere in the whole of Europe.

  Danger Mouse : Where did you get that document?

  Baron Silas Greenback : It fell off the back of a safe in the Medici Museum.

  Danger Mouse : I thought as much. But why a motorway? Why Venice?

  Baron Silas Greenback : Not just motorways, not just Venice. But carparks, shopping precincts, roundabouts, fly-overs in every city in Europe!

  Danger Mouse : You fiend! You'll ruin them. No one would... well no one would ever want to visit them.

  Baron Silas Greenback : Ah, this time you have it.

  Stiletto : Si, this time you have it.

  Danger Mouse : But why?

  Baron Silas Greenback : Because then, you witless one-eyed washout, every tourist in the world will be forced to visit my museum.

  Danger Mouse : Your museum?

  Baron Silas Greenback : The Greenback museum of Barry Mannilow record sleeves.

  Danger Mouse : You fiend. You would bring the world to it's knees.

• Penfold : Chief, isn't the Orient Express that train where people disappear and get, get you know, cor, you know...

  Danger Mouse : Penfold, you've been watching too many films about secret agents.

• Isambard Sinclair, narrator : [narrating]  And so the Orient Express thunders on. Crossing from... ehm... Eh, the, the brown bit to, to, the, eh, eh, pink bit.

  Danger Mouse : Look at that shade of pink,

  [takes a deep breath] 

  Danger Mouse : It's breathtaking. Isn't it exciting, Penfold?

  Penfold : [reading Chuckles Weekly]  Not half, Chief. Sidney the Spider's at it again, hah!

• Penfold : I'm going to stretch my legs, Chief.

  Danger Mouse : Alright, shorty.

  [chortles at his little joke] 

  Penfold : [looks at DM, then slowly closes the door]  I do hope he's alright.

• Danger Mouse : [DM and Penfold are tied to the sails of a windmill]  Lovely day for a sail.

  Penfold : Pardon?

  Danger Mouse : Never mind. Just hang on and I'll get us out of this.

  Penfold : Hang on? Ooh, do I have a choice?

• Isambard Sinclair, narrator : [narrating]  And so ends another rib-tickling, spine-tingling, nail-biting, kneecap-rattling adventure of... of... eh... Oh dear, whatshisname?

• Colonel K : Some department I never heard of coughed up for tickets... for a train... Orient Express.

  Danger Mouse : I beg your pardon, Colonel?

  Colonel K : Tickets for the Orient Express at your hotel.

  Penfold : What's the Orient Express doing at our hotel, Colonel?

  Colonel K : I don't know, Penfold. Are you staying at the station?

  Danger Mouse : [extremely long-suffering]  I don't think I can take much more...