Mel Smith: Various Roles

Quotes 

• Catholic Woman : [sits and crosses herself, then clasps her hands]  Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It's a week since my last confession.

  [she receives no reply] 

  Catholic Woman : Father? Are you there, Father?

  Father Patrick : [recording]  Father Patrick is out at the moment. You can leave your confession by speaking clearly through the window and he will forgive you when he gets back. Please speak after the tone.

  [tone sounds] 

• Shaving Reporter : At a party to celebrate her 55th birthday last week, Mrs. Thatcher blew on the cake and lit the candles.