The Office (TV Series)

Dunder Mifflin Infinity (2007)

Rainn Wilson: Dwight Schrute

Photos 

Quotes 

• Angela Martin : I heard a joke today.

  Dwight Schrute : [awkward laughter]  Oh, that's funny.

  Angela Martin : Yes, it was.

• Angela Martin : [during dinner]  How's your meat?

  Dwight Schrute : Dry. Delicious.

• Aaron Grandy : [seeing Michael and Dwight soaking wet]  What happened to you guys?

  Michael Scott : Give it back. The gift basket. Give it back.

  Aaron Grandy : Oh, what is this?

  Dwight Schrute : It's real simple. If you don't appreciate what we do, then give us back our basket.

  Aaron Grandy : Maybe you should leave.

  Michael Scott : Yeah, maybe we should. Maybe we should leave.

  [to Dwight] 

  Michael Scott : Come on, let's leave. But before we leave, my wet friend and I are gonna wait for our cabs on your nice couches!

  [he sits on a couch, intentionally getting water all over it] 

  Dwight Schrute : [sarcastically]  Could you call us a cab, please? I'm gonna...

  [he squeezes his jacket sleeve, getting water all over the couch] 

  Dwight Schrute : Oh, sorry.

  Michael Scott : Look, my clothes are so wet.

  Dwight Schrute : Nice leather.

  [scraping his shoes on the couch] 

  Dwight Schrute : Oh, my shoes are so muddy.

  Aaron Grandy : [puts the gift basket on the table]  All right, here you go. Take it back!

  Michael Scott : It's been opened.

  Aaron Grandy : Yeah, it was mine.

  Michael Scott : What's missing? The turtles... Where are the turtles? Where are the turtles?

  Aaron Grandy : Come on, guys, get outta here!

  Michael Scott : [screams]  WHERE ARE THE TURTLES? WHERE ARE THEY?

  Dwight Schrute : [to the office]  Excuse me, I have an announcement to make. We seem to be missing a box of chocolate turtles with pecans, and we will not be leaving the premises until we obtain them. Hand. Over. The. Turtles. Now!

• GPS : Make a right turn.

  [Michael starts to turn right] 

  Dwight Schrute : Wait, wait, no no no, it means "bear right." Up there.

  Michael Scott : No, it said right. It said take a right.

  Dwight Schrute : No, no. Look, it means go up to the right -- bear right -- over the bridge, and hook up with 307.

  GPS : Make a right turn.

  Michael Scott : Maybe it's a shortcut, Dwight. It said go to the right.

  [he turns right] 

  Dwight Schrute : It can't mean that, there's a lake there!

  GPS : Proceed straight.

  Michael Scott : I think it knows where it is going.

  Dwight Schrute : This is the lake! THIS IS THE LAKE!

  Michael Scott : The machine knows! Stop yelling at me! Stop yelling!

  Dwight Schrute : NO! IT'S UP THERE! THERE'S NO ROAD HERE!

  [It's too late. Michael drives right into the lake] 

  Dwight Schrute : Remain calm, I have trained for this!

  [he unbuckles his seat belt] 

  Dwight Schrute : Okay. Exit the window! Here we go!

  [Dwight and Michael climb out the windows] 

  GPS : Make a u-turn, if possible.

• Dwight Schrute : [on Jim and Pam dating]  I don't see it. I think they both can do better.

• Dwight Schrute : [In a confessional referring to Pam and Jim dating]  I don't see it. I think they both could do better.