The Office (TV Series)
Launch Party (2007)
Steve Carell: Michael Scott
Photos
Quotes
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Kelly Kapoor : [after Michael reads out a memo] That's from Ryan? Does it mention if he's seeing anybody?
Michael Scott : No, it doesn't. I'll find out tonight.
Stanley Hudson : Yes, please let us know.
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Michael Scott : I kidnapped a kid.
Dwight Schrute : You had to. What other choice did you have?
Michael Scott : I could have paid for the pizza.
Dwight Schrute : Well, yeah.
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Dwight Schrute : I can make more sales than a computer. In fact, I challenge that website to make more sales than me today.
Angela Martin : Waste of time.
Michael Scott : What's that, pipsqueak?
Angela Martin : Waste of time. The website's going to win.
Dwight Schrute : You believe a computer can beat me?
Angela Martin : I don't care, but yes.
Dwight Schrute : Well, I will prove you wrong.
Angela Martin : I don't care, and you won't.
Dwight Schrute : You'll see.
Angela Martin : I won't be watching, and I won't.
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Jim Halpert : [about the delivery kid being held against his will] You need to let him go.
Michael Scott : Let go our little jerk boy before he has learned his lesson?
Jim Halpert : Yes.
Michael Scott : You know what, Jim? The world would be a better place if people were held accountable for their actions.
Jim Halpert : Yes, but not by kidnapping.
Michael Scott : I'm not kidnapping him, I'm keeping him until I get what I want.
Jim Halpert : As a hostage.
Michael Scott : I think you're overthinking it.
Jim Halpert : I think you're underthinking it.
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Angela Martin : [to Phyllis about misspelling launch on the party sign] It is awful. You've made this day awful.
Kevin Malone : Maybe you could just change the U into an A.
Michael Scott : [speaking in a hushed voice as he approaches the sign] Oh, lunch party.
Angela Martin : It's supposed to say launch!
Michael Scott : Okay! Wow! Easy booster seat. Nobody cares about this party anyway.
Angela Martin : I care!
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Michael Scott : [On the phone] Yes, is Alfredo there? Can I speak to a manager, then? Ok, can you tell the manager that I'm keeping his delivery kid until I get my discount on the eight pizzas I ordered? Yes, I know it is not on the coupon. Also, I would like him to throw in two, three pizzas, uhm, just for our...
Jim Halpert : [to MIchael] Ransom.
Michael Scott : ...Trouble. Ok. Alright.
[Hangs up the phone]
Jim Halpert : What did he say?
Michael Scott : He said no.
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Michael Scott : Well, the website is the brainchild of my brainchild, Ryan. It is my brain-grandchild.
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Michael Scott : There's only one place to get authentic New York-style sushi.
Dwight Schrute : Tokyo?
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Michael Scott : Are you ready to give me my discount now?
Delivery Kid : No.
Michael Scott : Ok, what have you been doing in here this whole time?
Delivery Kid : What kind of business is this?
Dwight Schrute : We're a paper company. The best paper company in the whole wide world.
Michael Scott : Alright, Dwight, knock it off.
[to the delivery kid]
Michael Scott : You better think about what you're doing, young man.
Delivery Kid : You better think about what you're doing.
Michael Scott : No! I'm an adult, I don't have to think or do anything. You're a kid, you're a little snot-nosed, punk kid who thinks he's better than everybody else. Because he's some hot shot, and you don't know anything about sales. So stop being a disrespectful little jerk.
Delivery Kid : Sales?
Michael Scott : Yes, sales, you sell pizza, last time I checked that's called sales.
Delivery Kid : You're such a loser.
Dwight Schrute : What did you just call him?
Delivery Kid : A loser.
Dwight Schrute : What did you say?
Delivery Kid : A loser.
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Ryan Howard : And now, from my old hometown, Scranton, Pennsylvania, my former boss, Michael Scott.
Michael Scott : [Satellite camera switches to Michael at the Scranton office branch] Hey, I think you should know that one of my salesmen beat your stupid computer. So take that, -bleep- !
Ryan Howard : [laughs and smiles embarrassingly] Always a jokester.