- Grant: I'm gonna fuckin' die out here and nobody's ever gonna find me again. What's my mom gonna think if they DO find me with my pants around my ankles and my dick out?
- Shannon: Lucky I didn't find you.
- H.G. Gudmanson: [voiceover] Dawn is both intelligent and evangelical. I could never figure that one out, but she has always managed to blind herself to things. Last night she invited me out to Marley's Tavern. I had a beer; she had a coke; I had another beer. The dating game came up and I came out. Dawn did not take it well. In fact, she screamed, "You can't be gay!" Unfortunately, she attracted an audience.
- Ryan McGonagle: Who was that Greek guy who was always pushin' that rock up the hill?
- H.G. Gudmanson: Sisyphus?
- Ryan McGonagle: Well, I don't think that's right, but... always feels like the rock I'm pushin's gonna win.