American Dad! (TV Series)
Dope and Faith (2007)
Seth MacFarlane: Stan Smith, Roger the Alien
Photos
Quotes
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[last lines]
Stan Smith : Hey, you still play golf, right?
Brett Morris : Stan, I'm a Satanist, not a poor person.
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Roger : [laughs] Oh, my God! Stan has no friends! And he didn't even realize! He's like America, THE GUY!
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Stan Smith : I'm having a spiritual crisis. What do you do when your best friend doesn't believe in God?
Father Donovan : Well Stan, we're hardly best friends.
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Roger : Hello, Sharper Image? Yeah, give me three Sopranos pinball machines, the radio golf ball, a floating ant farm, a flashlight hammer to smash the ants with if they piss me off...
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Stan Smith : God is my co-pilot! And the Virgin Mary is the hot stewardess! Ding! More peanuts, Mary!
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Roger : [after getting a faceful of cocaine] I AM INCREDIBLY FOCUSED RIGHT NOW!
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Roger : I was just taking a midnight stroll when I saw what looked like a magical owl fly by and... oh! Look at that! It's right here, and it's carrying a letter!
[Steve opens the letter and gasps]
Roger : What does it say?
Steve Smith : It says I've been admitted to Hogwarts School of Wizardry! The gypsy was right! I am special!
Roger : [snickering] And here I was thinking you were just a gullible idiot.
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Steve Smith : [walking in a carnival with Roger] You spent all your money trying to win a hat with antlers?
Roger : [angrily] I do not choose to discuss it.
Fortune Teller : [pointing at Steve] I see a very lucky boy.
Steve Smith : Wow, really? Will you tell my fortune?
Roger : Steve, before she tells you your future, let me tell you her past: forty years of alcoholism and three doctorless abortions.
Fortune Teller : You are a sad, angry little person.
Steve Smith : That's uncanny!
Fortune Teller : What would you like to know?
Steve Smith : Uhm... I don't know. I guess just if there's anything special about me or...
Fortune Teller : Yes! You are special. I - I see it!
Steve Smith : Wow!
Roger : Steve, she's just repeating whatever you say.
Steve Smith : You're just jealous because I'm special and you're not. You're boring and regular.
[walks off]
Roger : Uh! "Regular"? Oh, Steven... I'm going to hurt you so bad.
[to the fortune teller]
Roger : I got a question about the future: you see yourself taking a shower ever?