Suicide Squad (2016)
Jared Leto: The Joker
Photos
Quotes
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Amanda Waller : [narration] Before she ran off and joined the circus, she was known as Dr. Harleen Quinzel. A psychiatrist at Arkham Asylum. She was assigned to The Clown himself.
The Joker : Dr. Quinzel. You know, I live for these moments with you. What do you got?
Harley Quinn : I got you a kitty.
The Joker : So thoughtful.
Amanda Waller : [narration] She thought she was curing him, but she was falling in love.
The Joker : There is something you could do for me, Doctor.
Harley Quinn : Anything. I mean, yeah.
The Joker : I need a machine gun
Harley Quinn : A machine gun?
Amanda Waller : [narration] Talk about a workplace romance gone wrong.
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The Joker : Would you die for me?
Harley Quinn : Yes.
The Joker : That's too easy. Would you live for me?
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The Joker : [from trailer] I can't wait to show you my toys.
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The Joker : What do we have here?
Dr. Harleen Quinzel : I did everything you said. I helped you.
The Joker : Ah. You helped me. By erasing my mind? What few faded memories I had! No. You left me in a black hole of rage and confusion. Is that the medicine you practice, Dr. Quinzel?
Dr. Harleen Quinzel : What are you gonna do? You gonna kill me, Mr. J?
The Joker : What? Oh, I'm not gonna kill ya. I'm just gonna hurt ya... really, really bad.
Dr. Harleen Quinzel : You think so? Well, I can take it.
The Joker : [puts belt in her mouth] I wouldn't want you to break those perfect porcelain-capped teeth when the juice hits your brain.
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Amanda Waller : [narrating] And that was just the beginning.
[Joker and Harley drive crazily through Gotham City when Batman starts to follow]
Harley Quinn : Come on, Puddin'. Do it!
The Joker : Oh. We have got company.
Harley Quinn : Batsy, Batsy, Batsy.
Amanda Waller : [narrating] She's crazier than him. And more fearless.
[Batman leaps onto the roof of the car]
Harley Quinn : Stupid Bats, you're ruining date night!
[Harley attempts to shoot Batman through the roof]
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The Joker : I love this guy. He's so intense!
Monster T : [looking at Harley dancing] Mmm. You're a lucky man. You got a bad bitch.
The Joker : Oh, that she is. The fire in my loins. The itch in my crotch. The one, the only, the infamous Harley Quinn!
[whistles for Harley]
The Joker : Ooh, come to Daddy.
Harley Quinn : Puddin'!
[laughs]
The Joker : Listen, you are my gift to this handsome hunka hunka! You belong to him now.
Harley Quinn : Well...
[barks at Monster T and laughs]
Harley Quinn : You're cute. You want me? I'm all yours.
Monster T : I don't want no beef.
The Joker : You don't want no beef?
[mocking]
The Joker : You don't want no beef? You don't want no beef?
Harley Quinn : Why, what's wrong? You don't like me? Fine. Don't waste my time then.
Monster T : This is your lady.
The Joker : Look, are you enjoying yourself?
The Joker : No. That's your lady, Joker.
The Joker : That's right.
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[from trailer]
The Joker : Are you sweet talkin' me? All'a that chitchat's gonna getcha hurt...
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Harley Quinn : You got all dressed up for me?
The Joker : Oh, you know I'd do anything for you. By the way, I've got some grape soda on ice and a bear skin rug waiting.
Harley Quinn : Yeah?
Frost : Boss, we got a problem!
[the Joker's helicopter is struck by a missile]
The Joker : Huh? This bird... is baked. Okay honey, it's me and you.
Harley Quinn : Let's do it!
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Monster T : We finally meet.
Frost : Nah, he don't shake hands. But sit down and have a drink.
Monster T : Hey, J. On behalf of everybody, welcome back. I wanted to come by and personally say thank you. You making me good money. I'm making you good money.
The Joker : Are you sweet talking me?
[laughs]
The Joker : I love this guy. He's so intense!
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The Joker : Question... Would you die for me?
Harley Quinn : Yes.
The Joker : That's too easy. Would you... Would you live for me? Hmm?
Harley Quinn : Yes.
The Joker : Careful. Do not say this oath thoughtlessly. Desire becomes surrender. Surrender becomes power.
[pause]
The Joker : Do you want this?
Harley Quinn : I do.
The Joker : Say it.
[pauses]
The Joker : Say it. Say it. Pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty...
Harley Quinn : Please?
The Joker : [impressed] Aw! God, you're so... good.
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The Joker : Oh, you.
Dr. Harleen Quinzel : You're not leaving me. You're not leaving me!
The Joker : You, you, you're a pain in the ass.
Dr. Harleen Quinzel : I have done everything you said. Every test, every trial, every initiation. I have proved I love you. Just accept it.
The Joker : [interrupts] Got it, got it, got it, got it. I am not someone who is loved. I'm an idea. A state of mind. I execute *my* will according to my plan. And you, Doctor... are not part of my plan.
Dr. Harleen Quinzel : Just let me in. I promise... Let me in! I promise I won't hurt you!
The Joker : A promise-promise?
[laughs]
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Frost : You might wanna keep your mouth shut.
Griggs : Can I go, man? What the hell is going on, man? This is crazy.
The Joker : Blah, blah-blah, blah-blah. Blah-blah, blah, blah. All of that chitchat's gonna get ya hurt.
[smacks Griggs' shoulders]
Griggs : Oh! My God!
The Joker : Mmm.
[Joker holds out his ring and Griggs kisses it]
The Joker : I could tell you meant that.
Griggs : Yeah.
The Joker : [laughs] You're gonna be my friend.
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Harley Quinn : What, I got a hickey or something?
The Joker : Professor, could you pick up the pace?
[Harley receives text from the Joker, then moves towards his helicopter]
Deadshot : Harley!
The Joker : Hello, baby!
Amanda Waller : Kill her!
Rick Flag : Her nanite's disarmed!
The Joker : Come on, baby!
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The Joker : [sarcastically as Harley holds a gun to his head] Don't hurt me. I'll be your friend.
[seriously]
The Joker : Do it. Do it, do it, do it, do it, do it.
Dr. Harleen Quinzel : My heart scares you, and a gun doesn't?
The Joker : Do it!
[snatches gun away and laughs]
The Joker : Ah, if you weren't so crazy, I'd think you were insane. Go... away.
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The Joker : Where is she?
Frost : It's complex. This is not just her. Everybody's disappearing. There's this new law, where if you're a bad enough bad guy, they stamp "terrorist" on your jacket. They send you to this swamp in Louisiana. A black site. That's where she is.
[pause]
Frost : So, what are we doing?
The Joker : Bring the car around. We're going for a drive.
[laughs]
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The Joker : [text message to Harley] I'm coming for you.
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Harley Quinn : Puddin'!
[kisses the Joker]
Harley Quinn : You got all dressed up for me?
The Joker : Oh, you know I'd do anything for you. By the way, I've got some grape soda on ice and a bear skin rug waiting.
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The Joker : [text message to Harley] I am close be ready...
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The Joker : If you weren't so crazy, I'd think you were insane...
