Royal Pains (TV Series)

Pilot (2009)

Ezra Miller: Tucker Bryant

Quotes 

• Hank Lawson : [noticing the wealth of Tucker's residence]  And who is "Dad?"

  Tucker Bryant : Uh, Marshall David Bryant IV.

  Hank Lawson : Never heard of him.

  Tucker Bryant : Yeah, uh, well, that's 'cause this is my great-grandfather's money he spends, collecting all those toys.

  Hank Lawson : Who's your great-grandfather?

  Tucker Bryant : Uh, Marshall David Bryant II.

  Hank Lawson : Never hear of him either.

  Tucker Bryant : Ever use a blender?

  Hank Lawson : Yeah.

  Tucker Bryant : You're welcome.

• Tucker Bryant : [to Hank, about Libby]  Yeah, dude, don't punk the 'crackberry.' She'll light yo ass up like a Christmas tree.

• Dr. Hank Lawson : [to Libby]  You're just a cyberchondriac - a rabid cyberchondriac, I'm afraid - but, uh, it's nothing that'll kill you.

  Tucker Bryant : [stifles a laugh; Libby looks at him]  Sorry.

• Hank Lawson : [noticing Tucker's limp]  You know what? Let me have a look at that leg.

  Tucker Bryant : Oh, no. I'm solid, man. I'm just a bit banged up, but what would be mighty fine of you is if we could keep this whole little episode on the DL?

  Hank Lawson : [laughs]  You don't think Dad'll notice the, uh, Ferrari Challenge out front that looks like it's been through your great-grandfather's invention?

  Tucker Bryant : Uh, no. He's at his San-Tropez beach house for the next ten days. I have plenty of time.

  Hank Lawson : That's a half-million-dollar piece of hand-assembled machinery. Ten days is plenty of time to repair it?

  Tucker Bryant : No, not repair it, replace it.

  Hank Lawson : Aren't there, like, seventy in the world?

  Tucker Bryant : Uh, yeah, but I only need to buy one. Look, what Dad doesn't know won't hurt him, and you can't really put a price on not hurting your old man, right? I mean, this is what trust funds are for.