The Office (TV Series)
The Cover-Up (2010)
Steve Carell: Michael Scott
Photos
Quotes
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Michael Scott : This isn't ice cream, Jim. It's mayonnaise and black olives. It's comfort food.
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Michael Scott : She won't say "I love you."
Andy Bernard : How many dates have you been on?
Michael Scott : Nine dates. I said it on the second date.
Oscar Martinez : That seems... quick. Even for lesbians.
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Ryan Howard : Does she keep her phone locked around you, Michael? Does she watch how much she drinks around you, Michael?
Ryan Howard : [to camera] Does she leave the room when she makes phone calls? Does she keep perfume in her purse? Does she shower before sex? Does she shower after sex?
Ryan Howard : [Back in Conference room] Does she...
Michael Scott : Yeah, she does all that.
Ryan Howard : Sorry, dude.
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Michael Scott : Jim. Are you clicking a detonator?
Jim Halpert : It's a pen.
Dwight Schrute : Michael, come on.
Michael Scott : Get back to work, Dwight. Please.
Dwight Schrute : Fine.
[clears throat]
Dwight Schrute : Hey. Tap away.
[Dwight puts noise-cancelling headphones on; Pam and Jim begin to blink rhythmically]
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Michael Scott : Well, that's easy for you to say. You have a bad imagination. It's stupid. I live in a fantasy world.
Jim Halpert : You do?
Michael Scott : Yes, Jim. I do!
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Michael Scott : I need the name of a good private investigator.
Dwight Schrute : I think I've got one for you.
[reaches into wallet, pulls out a business card, and hands it to Michael]
Michael Scott : This is you. How much do you charge?
Dwight Schrute : $100 a day, plus expenses.
Michael Scott : I'll give you $50. Money's no object.