The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)
The Justice League Recombination (2010)
Jim Parsons: Sheldon Cooper
Photos
Quotes
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Zack : You know, I saw this great thing on the Discovery Channel. Turns out that if you kill a starfish, it'll just come back to life.
Sheldon Cooper : Was the starfish wearing boxer shorts? Because you might have been watching Nickelodeon.
Zack : No, I'm almost sure that it was the Discovery Channel. It was a great show. They also said dolphins might be smarter than people.
Leonard Hofstadter : They might be smarter than some people.
Zack : Maybe we can do an experiment to find out.
Sheldon Cooper : That's easy enough. We need a large tank of water, a hoop to jump through, and a bucket of whatever bite-sized treats you find tasty.
[the guys laugh at him]
Zack : I don't get it.
Leonard Hofstadter : A dolphin might.
Zack : Oh, I see. You guys are inferring that I'm stupid.
Sheldon Cooper : That's not correct. We were implying it. You then inferred it.
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Penny : What the hell is wrong with you?
Sheldon Cooper : I'm The Flash. I just knocked 30,000 times.
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Zack : Look up in the sky. It's a bird. It's a plane.
[Zack jumps into Sheldon and Leonard's apartment in his Superman costume]
Zack : I forget the rest.
Penny : [Enters wearing a Wonder Woman costume with a low-cut top] All right. Let's get this thing over with.
Sheldon Cooper : I'm sorry. But in what universe is Wonder Woman blonde?
Howard Wolowitz : Relax. No one's gonna be looking at her hair.
[Penny punches Wolowitz in his shoulder]
Howard Wolowitz : Ow! I mean...
Howard Wolowitz : [in gravelly voice] Ow.
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Howard Wolowitz : Okay, the good news is, we have a Wonder Woman.
Sheldon Cooper : Oh.
Raj Koothrappali : Yes.
Sheldon Cooper : What's the bad news?
Howard Wolowitz : Superman probably isn't getting laid tonight.
Zack : [Looks down at his Superman costume] Aw, damn.
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Sheldon Cooper : Amy Farrah Fowler doesn't believe in wearing costumes. She isn't the free spirit I am.
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Penny : I'm still mad at you.
Zack : Well, you won't be when you hear the great news.
Penny : What great news?
Zack : We're going to a costume party at the comic book store on New Years Eve, and you get to be Wonder Woman.
Sheldon Cooper : Complete with bulletproof bracelets and lasso of truth. Invisible plane sold separately.
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Raj Koothrappali : Oh, great. No Superman, no Wonder Woman? All we've got is a skinny Flash, an Indian Aquaman, a nearsighted Green Lantern, and a teeny, tiny Dark Knight.
Sheldon Cooper : Obviously, we're no longer a Justice League. We have no choice but to switch to our Muppet Baby costumes.
Raj Koothrappali : Ooh, I call Kermit.
Sheldon Cooper : I'm Kermit. You're Scooter.
Raj Koothrappali : Oh, man. Scooter sucks. He's the Aquaman of the Muppet Babies.
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Howard Wolowitz : [in gravelly voice] I'm Batman.
Sheldon Cooper : Oh, I hardly think so. The real Caped Crusader calls his crime-fighting cohorts when he's running late.
Howard Wolowitz : I had to walk. I couldn't get Raj on the back of my scooter.
[Raj walks inside in his Aquaman costume with attached seahorse]
Raj Koothrappali : I've said this before and I'll say it again, Aquaman sucks.
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[last lines]
Leonard Hofstadter : Look, I know our winter thermostat setting is seventy-two degrees, but I'm a little warm so I'm going to turn it down.
Sheldon Cooper : [runs to the Grand Canyon as The Flash] Good Lord, how you frustrate me, Leonard Hofstadter!
[runs back to the apartment and becomes himself]
Sheldon Cooper : Fine.
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Zack : I haven't been to a comic book store in literally a million years.
Sheldon Cooper : Literally? Literally a million years?
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[first lines]
Raj Koothrappali : [playing a card] Water Demon.
Howard Wolowitz : [playing a card] Ice Dragon.
Leonard Hofstadter : [playing a card] Lesser Warlord of Ka'a.
Sheldon Cooper : Not so fast.
[playing a card]
Sheldon Cooper : Infinite Sheldon.
Leonard Hofstadter : Infinite Sheldon?
Sheldon Cooper : Yes. Infinite Sheldon, it beats all other cards - and does not violate the rule against homemade cards because I made it at work.
Leonard Hofstadter : You understand why people don't want to play with you?
Sheldon Cooper : No. Although it's a question I've been pondering since preschool.
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Howard Wolowitz : Check it out; those guys are breaking into that car'
Leonard Hofstadter : What should we do?
Sheldon Cooper : We're the Justice League of America. There's only one thing we *can* do: turn around and slowly walk away.
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Zack : [entering the comic book store] Where do they keep the Archies?
Sheldon Cooper : In the bedrooms of ten-year-old girls, where they belong.
Zack : Oh, no, you're thinking old-school Archie. It's much more sophisticated now. Like, there's two universes, and Archie's married to Betty in one and Veronica in the other. Midge is even breaking up with Moose.
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Sheldon Cooper : Wonder Woman was an Amazon. And Amazons tend to be very beefy gals.
Penny : Goodbye, Sheldon!
[slams the door]
Sheldon Cooper : But they're not blond, so put on your wig!
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Leonard Hofstadter : [about apologizing to Zack] What would I even say?
Sheldon Cooper : "Zack, I'm sorry you're stupid. Have a Milk Dud."
Raj Koothrappali : A Milk Dud?
Sheldon Cooper : Yeah. Milk Duds, with their self-deprecating name and remarkably mild flavor are the most apologetic of the boxed candies.
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Leonard Hofstadter : You can't replace me with Zack.
Sheldon Cooper : Why not? Penny did.
Howard Wolowitz : Yeah, she seems happier. Why wouldn't we be?
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Sheldon Cooper : It occurs to me that we might have an opportunity to finally snare Best Group Costume if we shore up our weak link, which is clearly Leonard as Superman.
Leonard Hofstadter : Hey, I got new boots this year, guaranteed to add 3 inches.
Sheldon Cooper : That's sad. Let's ask ourselves, is there anyone we know who would make a more manly and convincing son of Krypton?
Stuart Bloom : Than Leonard in high-heel boots? Howard's mother in high-heel boots?