The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)

The Prestidigitation Approximation (2011)

Johnny Galecki: Leonard Hofstadter

Photos 

Quotes 

• Leonard Hofstadter : Are you familiar with Darwin's observation of the finches in the Galapagos Islands?

  Penny : Did they make a movie about it?

  Leonard Hofstadter : No.

  Penny : Then, no.

• Leonard Hofstadter : What's up with the infrared cameras?

  Sheldon Cooper : I'm measuring residual heat levels on the playing cards to determine which ones have been touched. By the way, if you hope to have children, I suggest you switch from briefs to boxers. Your testicles look a tad warm.

• Leonard Hofstadter : Last night, me wanting to try that stuff out of the Kama Sutra... was that fun for you, or kind of racially insensitive?

  Priya Koothrappali : Yeah, just because you're in bed with an Indian woman, you think that gives you permission to use crazy positions from an ancient Indian love manual?

  Leonard Hofstadter : Hey, if you can find a book called "Weird Sex With White Boys", I'd be okay with that.

• Priya Koothrappali : Listen, we need to talk about something.

  Leonard Hofstadter : [panicked]  Oh, my god, you're breaking up with me. Why would you take me clothes shopping and then break up with me? That is just cruel.

  Priya Koothrappali : Leonard, relax. I'm not breaking up with you.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Oh.

  [he takes a breath from his inhaler] 

  Leonard Hofstadter : [playing it cool]  So, what's up?

• Leonard Hofstadter : Penny and I are just friends.

  Priya Koothrappali : I don't care. This is a woman you have slept with. If you want her around, then I have to wonder if maybe you're not ready to move on.

  Leonard Hofstadter : No, no, no, I'm ready. I gave up the gift of sight for you! If that's not moving on, what is?

• Leonard Hofstadter : How about we still hang out, but on the down low?

  Penny : Are you really that kind of guy?

  Leonard Hofstadter : No. I actually felt kind of silly just saying "on the down low."

• Penny : Oh, for god's sake, Leonard, this is about Priya, isn't it? She doesn't want me hanging out with you.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Yes. There, I said it.

  Penny : Okay, look, I happen to like your girlfriend.

  Leonard Hofstadter : And she likes you.

  Penny : No, she doesn't.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Not really, no.

  Penny : It doesn't matter. Look, I promise from now on I will keep my distance from you.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Well, now, hold on. What kind of distance are we talking about? Because we are neighbours. I mean, I can hear the toilet flush in your apartment.

  Penny : You can hear my toilet flush?

  Leonard Hofstadter : I don't listen for it, but it's nice to know everything's okay with your plumbing. The building's plumbing.

  Penny : Leonard, I get it. You're in a new relationship now. And I'm happy for you. So why don't we just shake hands and part friends?

  Leonard Hofstadter : Well, now hold on, how about this? How about we still hang out, but on the down-low?

  Penny : Are you really that kind of guy?

  Leonard Hofstadter : No. I actually felt kinda silly just saying on the down-low.

  Penny : [sadly]  Goodbye Leonard.

• Leonard Hofstadter : Check it out. Just got contacts.

  [scene switches to Leonard view - out of focus] 

• Leonard Hofstadter : Hypothetically, if I had access to a Lieutenant Uhura uniform, would you wear it?

  Priya Koothrappali : Leonard, it is a source of great pain to me and my family that my brother has that outfit in his wardrobe.

• Priya Koothrappali : You have such beautiful eyes. Have you ever thought about getting contacts?

  Leonard Hofstadter : I tried in the 7th grade. I could never get used to 'em.

  Priya Koothrappali : Oh, that's too bad.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Yeah, if I had contacts, I would have been the coolest debate club president to ever be stuffed into his own cello case.

  Priya Koothrappali : If you had them on now, you could see what we're going to do next.

  [kisses Leonard] 

  Leonard Hofstadter : That's okay, I can infer from context.