The Office (TV Series)

Dwight K. Schrute, (Acting) Manager (2011)

John Krasinski: Jim Halpert

Photos 

Quotes 

• [Dwight walks into the kitchen as Jim puts up a paper that says "Join The Fist" with a picture of a clenched fist] 

  Dwight Schrute : Hey, hey, hey, hey. What do you think you're doing? What's this? What's The Fist?

  Jim Halpert : It's just a social club. Like the French Revolution or The Black Panthers or communism. It's just a club. Guys talking.

  Dwight Schrute : You expect me to believe that you're starting a rebellion?

  Jim Halpert : Nope, social club. God, I hate when everybody calls us a rebellion.

  [Darryl walks into the kitchen. Jim puts his fist up and Darryl does it back] 

  Dwight Schrute : Okay, you know what? I would love to join The Fist.

  Jim Halpert : And we would love to have you, but not today. Unfortunately, it's a bad day, what with Operation Overthrow and everything.

• [in regards to Jo coming in to talk with Dwight as acting manager] 

  Dwight Schrute : So I expect you to be on your best behavior, which means none of you will be insubordinate, nor will you foment insurrection.

  Jim Halpert : Question. If we've already fomented insurrection, may we be grandfathered in?

  Dwight Schrute : Define "foment."

  Jim Halpert : You define "foment."

• [Deleted scene. Jordan walks up to Jim's desk with a clipboard] 

  Jordan Garfield : Hey, Jim.

  Jim Halpert : Hey.

  Jordan Garfield : What are you doing?

  Jim Halpert : Just trying to process this invoice by 3:00. What are you doing?

  Jordan Garfield : I am making a list for Dwight on what everyone's secretly up to.

  Jim Halpert : No, you're not. 'Cause I'm doing that.

  [Jim takes the clipboard] 

  Jordan Garfield : Don't you have a deadline?

  Jim Halpert : Well, it's not all about deadlines, Jordan.

  [Jim begins writing down made-up things for Dwight's list] 

  Jim Halpert : Does "gorilla" have two "R's"?

  Jordan Garfield : The animal or the soldiers?

  Jim Halpert : Both, actually.

• [Dwight is talking to Jim in Dwight's office] 

  Dwight Schrute : Jo is coming later today. I cannot have a subordinate trying to make me look stupid. Okay? I need you to promise me you'll be on your best behavior.

  Jim Halpert : I *promised* other people that I would be on my worst behavior. And I gave them my word, so...

  Dwight Schrute : Don't make me fire you.

  Jim Halpert : You can't fire me. You're acting manager, not office manager, so you have no firing powers.

  Dwight Schrute : Don't make me pre-fire you.

  Jim Halpert : [serious tone]  You wouldn't dare.

  Dwight Schrute : Watch this. You're pre-fired. And when I'm promoted, you'll be full-fired.

  [Jim stands up and talks softly] 

  Jim Halpert : If you get promoted. And if you haven't fallen in love with me by then.

  Dwight Schrute : [shocked]  What?

• [as Jim, Dwight, and a small group decide what to get Deangelo in the hospital] 

  Jim Halpert : All in favor of the baskets full of chocolates, teddy bears, and ballons.

  [Everyone but Dwight raises their hands] 

  Dwight Schrute : Wait, wait. All in favor of the knapsack filled with canned goods, chainsaw, gasoline and emergency radio in case he wakes up post-apocalypse.

  [Dwight raises his hand, as Jim jokingly looks around the group to see if anyone else did. No one else raises their hands] 

  Jim Halpert : Nope. Baskets have it.