An Idiot Abroad (TV Series)
Swim with Dolphins (2011)
Karl Pilkington: Self - Presenter
Quotes
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Karl Pilkington - Presenter : Sharks are always dangerous. Jaws, Shark Attack One, Two, and Three. Three films there. There was a chance for him to get friendly. Didn't. An angry shark for three films.
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Karl Pilkington - Presenter : The fact that we have to take medics with us says to me we shouldn't be going there.
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Rodney : [showing pictures of himself after getting attacked by a shark] They took a photograph of me before they stitched me up. See those individual teeth marks? The chances of this happening to you or anybody else are so small...
Karl Pilkington - Presenter : But, someone would have said that to you, before it happened to you.
Rodney : That's right. But records are meant to be broken.
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Karl Pilkington - Presenter : [about to meet a ladyboy] Well, it's kind of like a, like a trany person, isn't it. It's like a, a bloke who prefers to be more like a woman. But I don't know if it's like gay, or is it like Eddie Izzard where it's just, ya know, oh I like wearing bras and knickers and stuff, and then you take them off and you're a bloke again. I don't know how committed they are. I don't know if you get different levels of commitment. But at the end of the day, how much, ya know, I suppose I'll be looking for little signs of blokage.
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Karl Pilkington - Presenter : [watching monkeys] That's like, that one's me. And that's Ricky and Steve there. That's Ricky on top of my, winding me up. And then I'm sick of it.
Luke : Which one's Steve?
Karl Pilkington - Presenter : The one in the corner playing itself. There's Ricky again: "Let's do another Series. I'd rather not. Well, come on then."
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[last lines]
Karl Pilkington - Presenter : [in shark cage] This is like when you're driving and you get a wasp in the car, you can't relax. Good God, that's a biggie. He's coming towards us. That - is - massive.
[as it bites the cage]
Karl Pilkington - Presenter : It's the size of a sofa!
