The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)

The Transporter Malfunction (2012)

Kaley Cuoco: Penny

Photos 

Quotes 

• Leonard Hofstadter : Once you open the box, it loses its value.

  Penny : Yeah, yeah. My mom gave me the same lecture about my virginity. Gotta tell you, it was a lot more fun taking it out and playing with it.

• Penny : Tada!

  Sheldon Cooper : A vintage, mint in box 1975 Mego Star Trek Transporter, with real transporter action. Hotdarn!

  Leonard Hofstadter : Where did you get that?

  Penny : That's from Stuart at the comic book store.

  Leonard Hofstadter : You went to the comic book store by yourself?

  Penny : Yeah! It was fun. I walked in and two different guys got asthma attacks. Felt pretty good.

  Sheldon Cooper : This calls for an expression of gratitude.

  Penny : Ooh, am I about to get a rare, Sheldon Cooper hug?

  Sheldon Cooper : No, not this time, then they wouldn't be special.

  [makes a finger-gun gesture] 

  Sheldon Cooper : Thanks, Penny!

  Penny : You're welcome. Don't worry, I didn't forget about you. Leonard, I got you... a label maker!

  Leonard Hofstadter : Ahh... No, it's great. Also... it's mint in box.

  Penny : And... I got you a transporter too!

  Leonard Hofstadter : Awesome!

• Raj Koothrappali : All right, uh, fine. I'm coming and I'm bringing somebody. Koothrappali plus one.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Who are you bringing?

  Raj Koothrappali : [Defensively]  Who are *you* bringing?

  Penny : He's bringing me. And who are you bringing?

  Raj Koothrappali : Wow, what a bunch of nosy O'Donnells!

• Sheldon Cooper : It was me. I opened your toy... discovered it was broken, and didn't tell you.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Why would you open mine?

  Sheldon Cooper : I didn't, that was a lie. I opened my own toy... and it was already broken, so I switched them.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Well, you should talk to Stuart.

  Sheldon Cooper : I can't because that was a lie. Yours was broken in an earthquake and that's a lie.

  Penny : What is the truth?

  Sheldon Cooper : My Mr. Spock doll came to me in a dream and forced me to open it, and when the toy broke I switched it for yours. Later he encouraged me to do the right thing and I defied him. And then I was attacked by a Gorn.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Okay, that I believe.

• [first lines] 

  Penny : Oh my God, I love this chicken!

  Sheldon Cooper : Oh, you know what they say, 'Best things in life are free'.

  Penny : Okay, you're right, I eat your food a lot. Now, how 'bout this: you can raid my fridge any time you want.

  Sheldon Cooper : Oh, that's very kind of you. Next time I have a hankering to wash down a D-cell battery with a jar of old pickle juice, I'll come a-knocking.