Modern Family (TV Series)

Open House of Horrors (2012)

Nolan Gould: Luke Dunphy

Photos 

Quotes 

• Luke Dunphy : Why are there giant lollipops all over the front yard? And why do they taste so bad?

  Alex Dunphy : Because they're made out of cardboard, mouthbreather.

  Phil Dunphy : Hey! The world needs more dreamers, Luke. Never stop licking things.

• Ted Durkas : Hey, Delgado.

  Manny Delgado : Oh, no! Durkas! What I wouldn't give for this umbrella to have Mary Poppins' powers.

  Luke Dunphy : Oh, I pray he didn't hear that.

• Phil Dunphy : Okay, Claire, they're gone. You can come out now. Claire? Honey, I'm sorry I said you weren't scary. It's been such a long day. Can we please just go home?

  [the wind whistles and the power goes out] 

  Phil Dunphy : All right. I'm leaving without ya.

  [TV turns on, but there's only static] 

  Phil Dunphy : So... *this* remote you know how to use.

  [Turns the TV off; the phone rings and he drops the remote; slowly goes to answer it] 

  Phil Dunphy : Yes?

  Claire Dunphy : Phil, where are you?

  Phil Dunphy : Claire? Where are you?

  Claire Dunphy : I came over to scare you, but then I heard you showing the house to that couple, so I got out of your way.

  Phil Dunphy : Are... you at home?

  Claire Dunphy : Yeah, I got here ten minutes ago.

  Phil Dunphy : S-so... so you're saying... this call isn't coming from inside the house?

  Claire Dunphy : What are you talking about? Just get home, the kids and I are hungry.

  Alex Dunphy : Yeah, hurry up, Dad!

  Luke Dunphy : We miss you!

  Phil Dunphy : ... miss you too, Buddy...

  [Hangs up the phone; heads to the door but is distracted by a thump upstairs; walks into the bedroom to grab his keys on the bed] 

  Alex Dunphy : [Grabs his foot from under the bed]  Ah!

  Phil Dunphy : Aah! Aah!

  Luke Dunphy : [Jumps out from the closet]  Trick or treat!

  Phil Dunphy : Aaah!

  Claire Dunphy : [Jumps up from the bed]  Aah!

  Phil Dunphy : AAAHHH!

  Phil Dunphy : [Cutaway interviews]  I wasn't really that scared.

  [Claire smirks at him] 

• Ted Durkas : Heard you pulled the fire alarm today and got us out of that test. Good job.

  Manny Delgado : Thanks, Mr. Durkas.

  Ted Durkas : You know what? You don't need to call me that anymore. Anyway, we're all meeting at the playground at 8:00 and heading out, if you want to join.

  [Walks away] 

  Luke Dunphy : You're totally going to that.

  Reuben Rand : Yeah, if you want to ruin your reputation.

  Luke Dunphy : You're finally gonna be in with the cool kids.

  Reuben Rand : You need to talk at the school assembly on Monday and apologize to all the teachers.

  Luke Dunphy : [Scoffing]  Teachers. More like public sector parasites.

  Reuben Rand : Be strong, Manny.

  Luke Dunphy : Be smart. Adventures, parties.

  Reuben Rand : Juvie, hearthache.

  Luke Dunphy : Girls!

  Reuben Rand : But not the kind we want.

  Manny Delgado : They're all the kind we want! Mr. Dur--

  [Begins to chase after him] 

  Manny Delgado : Conrad!