The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)

The Santa Simulation (2012)

Kaley Cuoco: Penny

Photos 

Quotes 

• Penny : Hey guys. I don't mean to interrupt your little game, but I thought you'd like to see what you're missing out on. So, Bernadette.

  [Bernadette sashay's into the room] 

  Penny : Bernadette's wearing leopard print pumps and a raptastic red dress from Forever 21.

  [Bernadette exits and Amy strides in] 

  Penny : And there's Amy, showing all kinds of ankle. In an outfit I'm assuming is from Forever 63.

  [Penny removes her coat] 

  Penny : And I myself am wearing a little number that got me out of two speeding tickets and jury duty.

  Sheldon Cooper : I know they're making a rhetorical point; I just don't know what it is.

• [first lines] 

  Penny : [reading directions]  OK now, holding sides of hearth in position, lower mantelpiece assembly onto top tabs.

  Leonard Hofstadter : I consider I built a fireplace with my own two hands.

  Penny : You're so butch.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Oh, I got a little paper cut.

  Penny : Of course you did; your hands are softer than veal.

  Leonard Hofstadter : Oh, uh, before I forget: Saturday I'm planning a little Dungeons and Dragons night with the guys.

  Penny : Really! That's how you're going to spend your Saturday night?

  Leonard Hofstadter : Come on, I hardly ever get a chance to play any more.

  Penny : Oh you poor thing. Is having a real-life girlfriend who has sex with you getting in the way of your board games?

  Leonard Hofstadter : A little bit, yeah.

• Penny : See you, boys, we're going drinking.

  Raj Koothrappali : Wait, can I come with you? My character died.

  Bernadette Rostenkowski : Sorry, Raj, it's girls' night out.

  Amy Farrah Fowler : Maybe another time.

  [Penny, Bernadette, and Amy leave] 

  Leonard Hofstadter : [continuing the game]  Okay.

  Penny : [sticking her head back into the apartment]  Come on.

  Raj Koothrappali : [leaping off the couch]  Girls' night! Girls' night! Woo! Woo!

  [the apartment door closes behind Penny and Raj] 

  Stuart : How does he not hear that?

• [the girls are proposing they find a girl for Raj] 

  Raj Koothrappali : A couple of things: Don't tell them I come from money; I want them to love me for me. They must be *insanely* hot, like nines or tens.

  Penny : Nines or tens?

  Raj Koothrappali : OK, an eight is acceptable if she's willing to bring another eight to the hottub.

  Bernadette Rostenkowski : Bottom line, you'll take any woman who'll have you, right?

  Raj Koothrappali : In a New Delhi minute.

• Amy Farrah Fowler : So at, uh, some point, you probably had a thing for me, too.

  Raj Koothrappali : No, not really.

  Penny : Oh, come on, Raj, not even a little bit?

  Raj Koothrappali : Not that I can think of.

  Bernadette Rostenkowski : Think harder.

  Raj Koothrappali : Nope. I guess the heart wants what the heart wants. Or in this case, doesn't, I mean, at all. What?