- Donna Meagle: Barkin' up the wrong tree, Filo.
- Tom Haverford: What do you mean?
- Donna Meagle: Andy will never be the new Jerry. Nothing embarrasses him; he's like a giant puppy with no shame.
- Tom Haverford: Listen, now that Jerry's gone, we need to hire someone to pick up the slack.
- Ron Swanson: A new person in the office?
- Tom Haverford: Not a person - an intern.
- Ron Swanson: Why on Earth would I get an intern?
- Tom Haverford: Interns cost nothing to the taxpayer. And, more importantly, they're usually stupid and terrible, so they get no work done. It's like a Jerry you don't have to pay!
- Ron Swanson: Damn son, that is one compelling argument. Keep it up Filo - we may destroy this government one day after all.