The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)

The Status Quo Combustion (2014)

Kevin Sussman: Stuart Bloom

Quotes 

• Stuart Bloom : I don't mean to be rude, Sheldon, but, uh, my life is kind of falling apart right now.

  Sheldon Cooper : Your life? The university is making me do string theory. And my girlfriend loves me so much she wants to live with me. And now, the place I need to go when I'm sad is damp and smells funny.

• Howard Wolowitz : Don't take this the wrong way, but did you do this for the insurance money?

  Stuart Bloom : No. God, you sound like the police, the firemen, my parents, my therapist and the insurance company.

• Howard Wolowitz : Hang on, I know a place you can stay and earn some money at the same time.

  Stuart Bloom : Great!

  Howard Wolowitz : I just have to warn you it'll involve humiliation, degradation, and verbal abuse.

  Stuart Bloom : So, what's the catch?

• Stuart Bloom : [a lamp and a piece of the ceiling falls to the floor, almost hitting Stuart]  That could have killed me!

  Stuart Bloom : Can't catch a break.