Vice (I) (2018)

Kirk Bovill: Henry Kissinger

Quotes 

• Donald Rumsfeld : [carrying two drinks]  They gave me the keys to the damn palace! Chief of Staff.

  Dick Cheney : Holy shit! You salty son of a bitch. You did it.

  [glasses clink] 

  Donald Rumsfeld : All right, we have work to do. Kissinger is trying to kiss and make up with the Soviets.

  Dick Cheney : Well, let's make sure that shit doesn't happen.

  Donald Rumsfeld : [laughing]  Yeah.

  [cut to oval office meeting] 

  Dick Cheney : [to president Ford]  If I may, I believe I may have a way to put an oar in the water, on Russia. What if... we create...

  Henry Kissinger : [interrupts]  Mr. President.

  Gerald Ford : Come on Henry, let's hear Dick out.

  Kurt : [narration]  One of Dick Cheney's special super powers, was the ability to make the most wild and extreme ideas sound measured and professional.

  Dick Cheney : What if on a unilateral basis, we all put miniature wigs on our penises and we walked out to the White House lawn, and jerked each other off. So, like a puppet show, but much more enjoyable?

  Henry Kissinger : Hmmm... I do like a good puppet show.

  Gerald Ford : I say we do it.

  Reporter : Henry Kissinger has been relieved as National Security Adviser and replaced by Brent Scowcroft.

  Reporter 2 : They're calling it the Halloween Massacre.

  Henry Kissinger : Mr President.

  Gerald Ford : Hold on, Henry.

  Reporter 3 : Donald Rumsfeld has replaced Secretary of Defense James Schlesinger.

  Reporter 4 : [cut to the chief of staff's office]  And Dick Cheney has been chosen, as the...

  Lynne Cheney : Youngest Chief of Staff in history! It's amazing. It's a dream.