Lucifer (TV Series)
City of Angels? (2018)
Tom Ellis: Lucifer Morningstar
Photos
Quotes
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Lucifer Morningstar : Oh, i haven't heard music like that since... well, since the Silver City.
Amenadiel : What, there's no music in hell?
Lucifer Morningstar : Only for torture, and usually out of tune. Lately we've been playing music by this chap named Bieber. Gosh, you should hear the screams.
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Tío Sorrento : Where are you two from?
Lucifer Morningstar : [Speaking at the same time] Down south.
Amenadiel : Up north.
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Amenadiel : What's going on here?
Lucifer Morningstar : Uh, well, Brother, when a man and a woman really care about each other, they do a special cuddle for the cameras, which they sell for money.
Amenadiel : Luci, I know what porn is.
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Lucifer Morningstar : Why are there holes in your dress?
Amenadiel : It's a robe.
Lucifer Morningstar : Oh, I apologize. Why are there holes in your dress?
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Amenadiel : It's dangerous for humanity to be exposed to divinity.
Lucifer Morningstar : Well, I wouldn't sit on that couch... Left a lot of divinity there.
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Amenadiel : What, there's no music in Hell?
Lucifer Morningstar : Only for torture and usually out of tune. Lately, we've been playing music by this chap named Bieber. Gosh, you should hear the screams.
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Amenadiel : [about the corvette] Don't you need some sort of key to start it?
Lucifer Morningstar : You know me, Brother. I can turn anything on.
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Lucifer Morningstar : I didn't expect you to be so happy to lose your first fight ever, Brother. And to a human, no less.
Amenadiel : Nice try, Luci, but we both know this doesn't count.
Lucifer Morningstar : Ah.
Amenadiel : Not to mention the fact that no mere mortal could ever stand a chance against the full power of my God-given...
Lucifer Morningstar : Forget it. I regret mentioning it.
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Lucifer Morningstar : Apparently, they have 12 different types of whiskey.
Amenadiel : Yes, humans are funny with their infinite capacity for distractions.
Lucifer Morningstar : It's not distraction, Brother. It's choice.
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Lucifer Morningstar : There was a picture of our dead man standing next to a very distinctive décolletage.
Amenadiel : You identified a human by her boobs?
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Lucifer Morningstar : Oh, my gosh, that's her, in the flesh. That's Misty Canyons. Oh, my gosh! That's Penis Demilo. Ha! What is this, nirvana? Do all porn stars reside in L.A.?
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Amenadiel : Why are we here?
Lucifer Morningstar : Well, two reasons, actually. Uh, boobs.
Amenadiel : [sighs] Why am I not surprised?
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Amenadiel : You've spent more time with humanity, you may understand them better than I do.
Lucifer Morningstar : Well, most of that time, I was naked, but true nonetheless.
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Amenadiel : Oh, come on, Luci. There must be hundreds of porn stars in Hell.
Lucifer Morningstar : Sadly, no, on account of all the good work they do here on Earth, I assume.
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Amenadiel : Oh, these poor creatures. They know not what they do.
Lucifer Morningstar : I beg to differ. Everyone here is well aware that they're doing me.
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Sexy Jogger : You here for business or pleasure?
Lucifer Morningstar : Oh, pleasure. Always pleasure.
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Amenadiel : What's the plan?
Lucifer Morningstar : Plan is to get a drink. Can't think when I'm sober.
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Amenadiel : You're just trying to stall your return to Hell.
Lucifer Morningstar : Oh, I really hoped to get a few more drinks in before you worked that one out.