Lucifer (TV Series)

The Angel of San Bernardino (2018)

Tom Ellis: Lucifer Morningstar

Photos 

Quotes 

• Lucifer Morningstar : I woke up alone.

  Marcus Pierce : And?

  Lucifer Morningstar : It's funny because I usually don't, because I usually have women over. Or men. Or both. For sex.

• Chloe Decker : Go home. You're tired.

  Lucifer Morningstar : Okay. Fine. But, only if I can borrow these.

  [Holds up her handcuffs] 

  Lucifer Morningstar : I promise I'll bring them back.

  Chloe Decker : Please don't.

• Lucifer Morningstar : Will he be coming with you from now on? Because he is killing our banter.

  Chloe Decker : Absolutely not, no. Pierce and I only came...

  [Realizes what she just said] 

  Chloe Decker : Drove together just this one time. One time.

• Lucifer Morningstar : So what have we got, Booth?

  Chloe Decker : Booth?

  Lucifer Morningstar : Yes, the FBI agent on "Bones".

  Chloe Decker : The TV show?

  Lucifer Morningstar : Uh-huh. Watched all 12 seasons. It's riveting stuff. It's like watching a documentary of us.

• Lucifer Morningstar : No offense, brother, but on the list of things I'd like to wake up to, your face falls somewhere after a horse's head and Coldplay tickets.

• Lucifer Morningstar : You're clearly Booth. I'm Bones, obviously

  Chloe Decker : Obviously.

  Lucifer Morningstar : Kevin's autopsy report. Good.

  [Flicks through the pages] 

  Lucifer Morningstar : Now, I've been thinking, perhaps there was a slight depression on the occipital, or slight fractures to the femur? Did you know there were 206 bones in a human body? Each of them a clue, sometimes twice. And the coccyx is not what it sounds-...

  Chloe Decker : No coccyx.

• Rosie Hernandez : An angel, who saved me. It flew in here, and it just chased the evil man away.

  Lucifer Morningstar : [laughs]  I'm sorry, sorry, it's just the only thing my siblings would chase away are a good time.

• Rosie Hernandez : The angel... he took one of my figurines. Gabriel.

  Lucifer Morningstar : Right. Try lending him some money. Your tune changes rather quickly.

• Lucifer Morningstar : Murdering to keep the gig? That seems a tad method, don't you think?

• Linda Martin : And you don't remember how the figurine got into your bedroom?

  Lucifer Morningstar : No. I mean, maybe it's a housewarming gift or... or a sex toy. Or a housewarming gift sex toy.

• Linda Martin : You've been complaining about having weird dreams lately. Including one where you couldn't control your wings.

  Lucifer Morningstar : I've also dreamt I was king of the centaur people. Doesn't mean I'm gonna start wearing horseshoes.

• Lucifer Morningstar : [Confronting suspect]  I know you killed Kevin Winstead. And I know you killed that intern at the hospital. Yeah. Burned her body. Only her cranium was left in the smoldering, smoldering ashes.

  Chloe Decker : ...Lucifer. Lucifer. Are you talking about an episode of Bones?

  Lucifer Morningstar : Wha...?

  [Thinks] 

  Lucifer Morningstar : Oh, yes. Oh, yes, no, I suppose I am, actually. Yes, episode 306. "The Intern in the Incinerator."

  [Turns to suspect, who is the actor from said episode] 

  Lucifer Morningstar : Yes, of course. You were quite good.

  Matt Kessman : Thank you. Thank you. Yeah. Yeah, that wasn't an easy role.

• Chloe Decker : We'd like to ask you a few questions about Kevin Winstead.

  Phil Goldstein : The answer's yes... he's a douchebag.

  Lucifer Morningstar : Did you know that he was murdered?

  Phil Goldstein : No, but it's nice to get good news for a change.