The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)
The Sibling Realignment (2018)
Kaley Cuoco: Penny Hofstadter
Quotes
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Amy Farrah Fowler : Look at what you've done to me!
Penny Hofstadter : Ah, hey. Could you just, like, not touch my computer or... like, anything else. I just, ugh, I don't want to look like that in your wedding photos.
Amy Farrah Fowler : There aren't gonna be any wedding photos. My fiancé's a germophobe. If he finds out I'm contagious, he'll never come back from Texas.
Bernadette Rostenkowski : What if we tell him the theme of the wedding is "Walking Dead" and this is our zombie makeup?
Amy Farrah Fowler : That'll probably work. We'll call that plan B.
[she shuts the laptop; as Amy leaves, Penny takes the bottle of Purell from her gift bag]
Penny Hofstadter : [pouring it on her computer] Oh, well... turns out this is gonna come in handy after all.
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Penny Hofstadter : [Skyping with Bernadette] Oh, my god.
Bernadette Rostenkowski : [with both eyes puffy and infected] Yeah, I got it, too.
Penny Hofstadter : Wow. You really can't keep your hands off Howard, can you?
Bernadette Rostenkowski : I know, I have a problem. I just wanted to make sure you and Amy didn't get it.
Penny Hofstadter : [quietly] Well, I didn't get it.
Amy Farrah Fowler : [with an infected eye of her own] You infected me a week before my wedding! What am I supposed to do about this?
Bernadette Rostenkowski : Wear a veil?
[Penny laughs, but immediately stops upon seeing Amy's look of anger]
Penny Hofstadter : It is not funny.
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Howard Wolowitz : Bernadette says they're checking the kids now.
Penny Hofstadter : You know, maybe we didn't all need to come.
Amy Farrah Fowler : Hey, whatever kind of pinkeye their kids have, I have, and I need to know. And if it's viral, I'm screwed.
Howard Wolowitz : Maybe not. You know, I know it's not traditional wedding attire, but how about a welder's mask?
Raj Koothrappali : If you know a welder, that could be your "something borrowed."
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Amy Farrah Fowler : Okay, so each welcome bag gets a schedule of events, a map, and chocolate from me. And from Sheldon, a bottle of Purell, the number for Poison Control in case someone accidentally drinks the Purell, and a laminated table of elements because the American school system is a failure.
Bernadette Rostenkowski : How many out of town guests are there gonna be?
Amy Farrah Fowler : I'm actually not sure. Turns out Sheldon didn't invite his brother.
Penny Hofstadter : Mm. Now it's starting to sound like a wedding.
Amy Farrah Fowler : And his mom said she won't come if his brother's not there.
Bernadette Rostenkowski : Ooh, now it's starting to sound like a good wedding.
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Amy Farrah Fowler : I'm getting married in a week. You are not giving me pinkeye.
Howard Wolowitz : I don't have pinkeye.
Penny Hofstadter : [jumping off the couch to block his path] Hey! Hey. Hey. Step away from the bride.
Howard Wolowitz : Okay. I'll go back upstairs.
Bernadette Rostenkowski : Get in the shower and then take those clothes and burn them.
Penny Hofstadter : Yeah, and all the rest of your clothes!
[not sure if he heard her]
Penny Hofstadter : Ah, worth a shot.
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Bernadette Rostenkowski : We're so sorry we ruined your date.
Amy Farrah Fowler : Oh, boo hoo! His date got ruined. I'm about to get married, and look at me.
Penny Hofstadter : It looks like it's getting better.
Amy Farrah Fowler : Oh, does it? Does it look like that with your *two clear eyes*?
Penny Hofstadter : I'm sorry. Are you mad that I don't have pinkeye?
Amy Farrah Fowler : [simultanously with the others] What do you think?
Bernadette Rostenkowski , Howard Wolowitz , Raj Koothrappali : Yes!
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Penny Hofstadter : [playing with a child's toy at the doctor's office] Hey! I got all the beads to the other side.
Howard Wolowitz : It's not a puzzle, Penny.
Amy Farrah Fowler : Do you really want to be touching that? Do you know how many sick kids... you know what? Never mind. Knock yourself out.