The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)
The Paintball Scattering (2019)
Joshua Malina: President Siebert
Photos
Quotes
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Amy Farrah Fowler : It sounds like you don't want Sheldon to do the interviews.
President Siebert : It's not that we don't want Sheldon to do the interviews, it's just that we really want you to do the interviews. Without Sheldon.
Sheldon Cooper : [a server brings his condiments] Now, wait, wait, are you trying to exclude me?
President Siebert : Look, Sheldon, you're a brilliant man, but your people skills are...
Sheldon Cooper : This is not barbecue sauce! This is steak sauce! What are you trying to pull?
President Siebert : Like that.
Sheldon Cooper : This is ridiculous. It is my work, too, and I am perfectly capable of keeping it together for an interview.
President Siebert : Okay. Say somebody asks if you feel your work is derivative of the work of Professor Joseph Polchinski.
Amy Farrah Fowler : [Sheldon's face starts twitching] Seriously, can we get this man some barbecue sauce?
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President Siebert : Dr. Cooper.
Sheldon Cooper : Ah, President Siebert.
President Siebert : What are you doing in the regular cafeteria? You're a superstar.
[to the others]
President Siebert : No offense, worker bees.
[to Sheldon again]
President Siebert : You should join me in my private dining room. Dr. Fowler is already there.
Sheldon Cooper : Can I bring my friends?
President Siebert : No.
Sheldon Cooper : Can I bring my tater tots?
President Siebert : Yes.
Sheldon Cooper : All right, let's go.
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President Siebert : I just want you to know that you have our full support, and we're organizing a big media push. Articles, interviews.
Amy Farrah Fowler : Ooh, you want us to do interviews?
President Siebert : Uh, well, we're thinking a divide-and-conquer approach here, where you do the interviews, and Sheldon stays here and holds down the fort. You know, in case there's an emergency.
Sheldon Cooper : What kind of emergency would there be in physics?
President Siebert : I don't know. Maybe there's an object in motion that won't stay in motion. Or a reaction that's equal but not opposite.
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President Siebert : Welcome to the inner sanctum.
Sheldon Cooper : Oh, I do love a good sanctum.
Amy Farrah Fowler : Sheldon, look at my fruit plate. It's got kiwi on it.
Sheldon Cooper : Ugh. I don't like kiwi.
Amy Farrah Fowler : Neither do I, but it's so fancy.
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President Siebert : Well, this is nice. Why have we waited so long to do this?
Sheldon Cooper : Because you never invited us.
President Siebert : Ha-ha-ha! Well, the important thing is you're here now, and we're so excited about your work. This paper is going to do big things for all of us, so if there's anything that you need...
Sheldon Cooper : You know, actually, I could use some barbecue sauce for my tots. Oh, wait. No. Ketchup.
President Siebert : [to a passing waiter] Can we have some barbecue sauce and ketchup over here?
Sheldon Cooper : Both?
[to Amy, impressed]
Sheldon Cooper : So this is how the other half lives.
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President Siebert : There's my MVP; Most Valuable Physicist.
Sheldon Cooper : Thank you.
President Siebert : And my star of NPR "Science Friday" and a potpourri of popular podcasts.
Amy Farrah Fowler : I don't know if I'd use the word "star".
President Siebert : I would. I got an early look at the interview you did for "Wired", and it is glowing. They loved you.
Amy Farrah Fowler : That's great. Thanks for telling me.
Sheldon Cooper : Congratulations, Amy. I'm so proud of you.
President Siebert : And that headline: "The Neurobiologist Who Revolutionized Physics".
Sheldon Cooper : I'm sorry, the who did what to... huh?