- Penny Hofstadter: Okay, that's my dad. Now remember, don't bring up any baby stuff. All right? Not me wanting one, not you having one with Zack.
- Leonard Hofstadter: Got it.
- Penny Hofstadter: And if he brings it up, just change the subject to literally anything else.
- Leonard Hofstadter: Got it.
- Penny Hofstadter: But not the Cornhuskers, do not discuss the Cornhuskers.
- Penny Hofstadter, Leonard Hofstadter: Is that a sports team?
- Penny Hofstadter: Never mind, you're good.
- Penny Hofstadter: Can I get you something to drink? Maybe a beer?
- Wyatt: Sure, if you're having one.
- Penny Hofstadter: Okay.
- Wyatt: And why wouldn't you, since you're not pregnant?
- Wyatt: You think you're mad at me and Leonard, but maybe you're really mad at yourself.
- Penny Hofstadter: Why would I be mad at myself?
- Wyatt: Cause your regret this "no baby" plan of yours.
- Penny Hofstadter: You know it's pretty crappy of you to make me feel bad about this.
- Wyatt: I'm not trying to make you feel bad. But... do you?
- Penny Hofstadter: Yes. I feel like I'm letting everyone down. Hate disappointing Leonard, but I really hate disappointing you.
- Wyatt: Oh, Slugger, you could never disappoint me. Okay, your high school years were a little rough.
- Penny Hofstadter: And I'm sorry about that.
- Wyatt: There was you sneaking out at night and your boyfriends sneaking out in the morning.
- Penny Hofstadter: I said sorry.
- Wyatt: That time you got drunk and stole the horse.
- Penny Hofstadter: Yeah. I was there. I remember. Parts of it.
- Wyatt: But besides all that, being your dad is the best thing ever happenned to me.
- Penny Hofstadter: What about Lisa and Randall?
- Wyatt: They're okay. And I don't want you to miss out.
- Penny Hofstadter: I know.
- Wyatt: But if this is really what you want, or don't want, I'm on your side.
- Penny Hofstadter: Thanks.
- Bernadette Rostenkowski: [Floating] I hate this so much! Why am I doing this?
- Anu: To prove a stupid point to your husband.
- Bernadette Rostenkowski: Oh right. Worth it.
- Penny Hofstadter: What are those?
- Leonard Hofstadter: Vitamins. Zack wants me to take them to increase my virility.
- Penny Hofstadter: Zack used the word "virility"?
- Leonard Hofstadter: He may have said "wiener power".
- Sheldon Cooper: So you're willing to go through with this, even though she clearly has reservations?
- Leonard Hofstadter: If she has a problem, she should say something.
- Sheldon Cooper: She tried to seduce you. If that's not a cry for help, I don't know what is.
- Bernadette Rostenkowski: I'm a thrill-seeker, too. I've had to pull back since I became a mom, but I'll still jump on the back of a grocery cart and just roll through the meat section.
- Howard Wolowitz: And I'm married to her, which is quite the ride.
- Howard Wolowitz: Since you really, really want to go, I'll stay here.
- Bernadette Rostenkowski: Oh great.
- Howard Wolowitz: Unless you don't want to, because I was right and I do know you.
- Bernadette Rostenkowski: Well, if you really know me, then you know how far I'll go to prove a point.
- Howard Wolowitz: Apparently 34000 feet that way, then straight back down, up and down, over and over again until you throw up food you didn't even eat.
- Amy Farrah Fowler: This isn't gonna make you a dad. It's gonna be their baby, not yours.
- Sheldon Cooper: Although, some day, if that kid want's to know why he's short, near-sighted, and asthmatic, he may hunt you down.
- Leonard Hofstadter: I know someone who might be interested.
- Amy Farrah Fowler: [In the Cooper apartment, to Sheldon] No. Absolutely not!
- Sheldon Cooper: [on the phone, to Zack] I'm sorry. My wife says I'm not allowed.