Family Guy (TV Series)

You Can't Handle the Booth (2019)

Sarah Paulson: Sarah Paulson, Marcia Clark, Costumed Woman

Photos 

Quotes 

• Sarah Paulson : Hi, everybody. So sorry I'm late. I was stuck in the canyon.

  Stewie Griffin : Is that a euphemism for lesbian sex?

• Sarah Paulson : [to Peter and Lois]  Oh, you guys are back just in time for my big role.

  Lois Griffin : Hey, take it down a notch, Sarah. You don't even have an entry on the Family Guy wiki. Even Gronk's dad has one.

• Sarah Paulson : I also won an Emmy for my performance as Marcia Clark in "The People vs. O.J. Simpson."

  Lois Griffin : You won an Emmy for wearing a wig.

• Sarah Paulson : So, Lois, what will you be wearing to the Emmys this year?

  Lois Griffin : I think you know I won't be there.

  Stewie Griffin : I won a surfboard at the Teen Choice Awards. I left it in the kitchen at work, hoping someone would take it. No one did.

• Brian Griffin : Have a seat, Sarah. Shall I explain what we're doing here?

  Sarah Paulson : That's okay. It seems just like when I would do ADR for "American Horror Story" for which I have received five Emmy nominations.

  Lois Griffin : Well, some of us have awards, some of us have children.

  Sarah Paulson : What's that supposed to mean?

  Lois Griffin : Well, I don't know. You're the smart award winner. You figure it out.

• Sarah Paulson : This scene reminds me of the time I was being honored at the Kennedy Center.

  Lois Griffin : Oh, baloney sandwich, Sarah! Baloney sandwich!

• Chris Griffin : Um, Ms. Kunis, I would just like you to know that I have no problem with you breastfeeding in this booth. May I ask if you're still producing?

  Mila Kunis : Uh, I... uh, no, uh, Chris, I'm-I'm not uh, uh, producing.

  Chris Griffin : What about you, Miss Paulson? Are you producing?

  Sarah Paulson : I can see coming here was a mistake.

  Chris Griffin : Excuse me, Seth Green...

  Seth Green : Chris, I'm a man. I-I can't produce.

  Chris Griffin : Actually, I just wanted to say I enjoy your brillant work on "Robot Chicken."

• Stewie Griffin : Oh, right. This is where the fat man got stuck in the banister slats.

  Brian Griffin : Stewie, I'm gonna give you another crack at that because I believe what you meant to call them was baluster slats, not banister slats.

  Stewie Griffin : Banister, baluster. Same thing.

  Brian Griffin : [chuckles]  Stewie, banister and baluster are hardly the same things. A banister is the handrail that sits atop the upright supports. A baluster is the supporting structure itself.

  Sarah Paulson : Is this my water?

  Chris Griffin : No, it is not!

  Stewie Griffin : Brian, I've heard people say banister slats.

  Brian Griffin : Well, those people, like you, would be incorrect.

  Stewie Griffin : So the baluster is that big, round thing at the bottom of the stairs where the staircase begins?

  Brian Griffin : Big, round thing?

  [chuckles] 

  Brian Griffin : You're... you're just guessing stuff now. I believe what you're referring to is a newel post.

• Lois Griffin : [about Peter's song, "Halfway Down the Stairs"]  What the hell is this?

  Peter Griffin : I'll tell you what it is. An homage to a classing song from "The Muppet Show" sung by Kermit's nephew, Robin.

  Lois Griffin : I guarantee nobody got that.

  Sarah Paulson : I know this song!

  Lois Griffin : Oh, shut up, Sarah!

• Lois Griffin : Well, from now on, Peter, I'm not going...

  Sarah Paulson : Quiet! My character's talking!

  Lois Griffin : Peter, I don't know how you...

  Peter Griffin : I know. That right there was the main reason we split up.