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Reviews
Jersey Girl (2004)
OK for video
This latest release by Kevin Smith is quite different to those movies that he is better known for (Clerks, Mall Rats, Chasing Amy, Jay and Silent Bob etc). The movie has a much more mainstream feel to it and, while it is enjoyable enough, doesn't offer much of the unique 'Kevin Smithness' that his previous outings did.
Other reviews here will tell you more about the film itself, so I won't elaborate here. While I did find the film enjoyable, I'd recommend it as a video rental rather than a cinema experience. The ending for me especially smacked of Hollywood formula.
6/10
The Scourge of Worlds: A Dungeons & Dragons Adventure (2003)
Well worth it for D&D Players
This movie/game tells the story of a party of adventurers sent to capture a rogue Cleric of Pholtus and bring him back to his temple. The situation gets complicated though when the party meets another group intent on stopping him more permanently...
The movie plays for segments lasting up to 3 minutes, before presenting the viewer with a choice of which way the characters should progress the story. After selecting a choice, the movie continues along that path, presenting another choice every couple of minutes through the movie. A full 'viewing' of the film takes about 40 minutes.
As one other viewer noted, it is not possible to fast-forward through scenes that you have seen before, BUT you CAN use the chapter skip button on your DVD to skip to the end of the scene and straight to the next choice. This means that the absence of a fast forward is a very minor annoyance.
The story changes quite significantly depending on the choices made, though these different arcs will tend to rejoin later in the film. Some choices can result in death, though if these are midway through the film an option to restart at the last choice made is given. There are 4 different endings, each with differing amounts of success.
Dungeons and Dragons players (especially 3rd Edition) will see many aspects of the game faithfully reproduced in the movie. Spells, creatures and even some of the standard characters appear. I was pleased to see that this is not a 'kiddy' film, covering everything with cotton wool the way that the Dungeons and Dragons film did.
While the animation won't win any awards, it does the job and looks pretty good. My major gripe is the wooden animation in many fight sequences.
My rating of 7 assumes that the viewer will be at least familiar with the Dungeons and Dragons setting. Casual viewers may find it rates closer to a 6. I look forward to seeing more of these movies released in the future.
Requiem for a Dream (2000)
Drugstore Cowboy did it better...
I must admit that I was somewhat surprised to see that this film is rated at #46 (at time of writing) in the IMDB Top 250. While it was a good film, I don't think that it was powerful enough to rate so highly.
Perhaps it's that there are relatively few drug-culture films around and that the viewer is not accustomed to the shock that the inevitable downward spiral finishes at. Or maybe it just got a much wider audience than many of those that came before it.
In any case, the film is a good watch, but the highlight by far is the story of the mother and her obsession with dieting. I found myself drawn into her story far more than that of the other three characters.
Overall, I'd give this 7/10. If you liked this, check out Drugstore Cowboy - I think they did it better...
For Queen & Country (1988)
Slow paced, but captures the feel very well
I really didn't know what to expect when some friends and I hired this DVD. Denzel Washington plays Rueben James, a retired English Paratrooper, returning home to the housing estate he grew up in as a child. Here he finds that not much has changed since he left about 10 years beforehand.
Many of Rueben's friends are still involved in 'less than legal' occupations, and the poverty and wretchedness of the estate seems even worse than when he lived there before. He needs to decide just where he fits in back home, and what direction his life will take. Despite trying to make a new life for himself, obstacles from past and present seem to always get in the way.
While I did find this movie slow paced, it captured the dismal feel of this community excellently. It also avoided using simplistic general stereotypes (for example, police are portrayed both in a very positive and very negative light).
I would recommend this movie if you're in the mood for a bit of gritty realism, but don't expect to feel particularly upbeat afterward!
xXx (2002)
Totally over the top, but fun
I've noticed a number of criticisms against this movie based on it's
believability. I agree that a number of things in this movie are
completely over the top and just stretch the realms of imagination,
but that's half the fun of this flick! I was prepared to let these things
slide and just enjoy the action and fun. For that reason, I highly
enjoyed the film, giving it an 8.
One special point to note here is that Xander Cage, our hero, has
a surprisingly low body-count in the film when compared against
his contemporaries (the older Bonds would have low BCs, but
Pierce Brosnan is nocking up 50+ per film these days).
As stated everywhere, the stunts are pretty huge (some way over
the top), and potential viewers should go in with the expectation of
laughing at the ridiculousness of it sometimes, but this is a pretty
fun action film!
Shanghai Knights (2003)
See it for the Martial Arts action, nothing else
I thoroughly enjoyed Jackie Chan's martial arts scenes in
Shanghai Knights, but found most of the rest of the film to be a
little painful. My chief gripe with it was the introduction of too many
historical characters into the storyline, set in London in the late
19th Century.
10/10 for the action, 4/10 for the rest.
Ned Kelly (2003)
Keep in mind that this is a work of fiction!
A few of us went to check out Ned Kelly a few days ago, and more
or less got what we expected. For those that are unfamiliar with
the story of Australia's most famous Bushranger ('outlaw'), Ned
Kelly lived in country Victoria (south-eastern Australia) between
1854 and 1880. The son of Irish immigrants, his family was
singled out for attention by the local police.
<Spoilers in this next paragraph!>
After killing a few policeman while being hunted down for horse
stealing, a huge sum was placed on his head. Rather than lie low,
the Kelly gang resorted to robbing banks etc. Ned was eventually
captured at the siege of Glenrowan, the other gang members
killed. He was hung at the Old Melbourne Gaol in 1880 amongst
considerable opposition. Since then Ned has become an Australian icon, due in no small part to the fact that the police force
at the time was highly corrupt and had (initially) persecuted his
family somewhat unjustifiably. For one last bit of trivia, in recent
times, sketchy evidence has come forward suggesting that it was
actually Ned's brother Dan that was captured at Glenrowan, and
that Ned escaped.
<Spoilers end here>
That said, this film takes huge liberties with the truth, and writes a
fair bit of its own history too in order to provide a completely
unobjective look at the history behind these events. The story is
fine as a work of fiction, but it needs to be stressed that the real
story is not nearly so black-and-white. Ned's family was known to
police because his father was a criminal, and Ned did kill several
policemen. It is hardly arguable that the police could let this matter
lie and let a 'cop killer' go.
Heath Ledger and Orlando Bloom do a great job with the script
they are given and provide very solid performances. Those of you
not native to Australia may enjoy some of the _many_ shots of
native flora and fauna that litter the movie too.
While I was entertained, I did find that, even as a work of fiction, the
one-sidedness of the 'good vs. evil' in the story was too much to
swallow. It would have been better if the script had taken some
more shades of grey into account (as the real characters no doubt
had!)
Overall I give this a 6/10.
Bowling for Columbine (2002)
Asks a lot of good questions, but doesn't tie it up
I gave this movie 8 out of 10, mostly because it encourages the
viewer to start really thinking about the problem with American
society (and possibly other Western societies soon) today. Mike
Moore does a good job of demonstrating that there is a problem in
the US, one that doesn't seem to exist elsewhere. He then tries to
analyse why, and it seems to me that the conclusion is the culture
of fear promoted by the American media.
The movie becomes a little confused at points, because it tends to
go in directions that do not seem to follow this conclusion. For
example, Mike Moore attacks Charlton Heston on his gun
ownership stance, even though he himself has already agreed
that it is not the level of gun ownership that is the problem.
The segments on welfare and the poor, and how the richest
country in the world doesn't see the need to care for its own
disadvantaged is done very well, but I don't see that it is
particularly relevant to the gun issue. It just serves to take away
from the point Mike Moore is trying to make.
I would probably have given the movie a 7, but the subject matter
deserves and extra point. I feel that it is critical that more US
citizens watch this movie and start to think about what sort of world
they want to live in. Stand back for a little and look objectively at the
rest of the world and you'll see that there are a lot of things in the
US that can be improved (whether you won WW2 or not!).
Michael.
Dirty Deeds (2002)
Great movie that non-Australians may find a bit hard to get
Dirty Deeds sets itself apart from most other gangster films by the
brilliant portrayals of each of the main characters, and it's unusual
location.
Bryan Brown plays Barry Ryan, an Australian mobster who runs
the slot machines in Sydney in the late 1960's. His nephew, Darcy
(played by Sam Worthington) has just come back from Vietnam
and is looking for work. Meanwhile, Tony (John Goodman) and
Sal, Mafia mobsters from the US, come over to Australia to see
what they can do about getting a piece of the action...
What I loved about this film was that we didn't see all of the old
cliches come out about mobsters. Sure, we have a bit of violence
here and there, but this shows a smarter side to business in the
underworld. It's undeniable that John Goodman does an excellent
job of portraying a guy who knows what's expected of him, and
how to deal with things in a businesslike manner to get results.
His confusion at Australian customs in the 1960's is amusing,
and the movie plays up to the cultural differences very well.
One other point to note is that this movie gives a great deal of time
to strong female roles. Toni Collette plays Barry's wife, Sharon,
and does what in my mind is a brilliant job. The viewer is left with a
strong sense of what is required to be married into 'the business'.
I highly recommend this film to all gangster fans, but be warned,
there are many Australian colloquialisms that non-Australians
may find a little hard to follow. You should be able to get the gist of
it all though, so don't panic. Clever and funny - go see it!
Minority Report (2002)
Thought provoking but a couple of minor flaws
I was impressed with this adaptation of a short story by Phillip K.
Dick. The story is thought provoking and complex, and leaves a
number of ethical and philosophical questions for the viewer to
discuss long after the movie has finished.
On the whole, the movie was very solid, but there were a couple of
flaws that I found a little glaring.
In any case I would highly recommend this film.
SPOILERS BELOW!!!!
One of the things that bothered me the most about this film was
the fact that Tom Anderton (played by Tom Cruise) had been
accused of the future murder of another man, yet still retained
security access to pre-crime headquarters and even to the
maximum security prison for future criminals. I would have thought
it a matter of course that his access rights would be revoked as
soon as he became a suspect, though it it possible that his
access was 'arranged' due to other elements of the story. Still, I
found it a little difficult to imagine that such a 'Big Brother' society
would miss this fairly important security step.
The Scorpion King (2002)
Cheezy fun
I didn't go into The Scorpion King expecting much, so I wasn't very
disappointed. This installment in 'The Mummy' series is really a
standalone and doesn't require viewing of either (excellent)
Mummy movies.
When it comes down to it, we're all going to see the movie for the
same thing - The Rock. Is he worth it? Well, he won't win any
Oscars for his performance, but he does a decent enough job
given the script that he has to work with. As for WWF references,
well, there are a couple of things that you may pick up, but nothing
as obvious as "Do you smelllelelelelel what the Scorpion King is
cooking!?"
The rest? Well, you have your goofy sidekick, your romantic
interest, your 'evil' villain, a bunch of posing, some good special
effects and lots of flesh on-screen. My girlfriend pointed out after
the movie that she didn't spot a single fully clothed female
throughout the entire film.
As stated in my summary, the movie is pretty cheezy, but easy to
watch. You will definitely groan at several points of the film (some
where the film wants you to, many where you don't). Be warned.
Heartbreakers (2001)
Fun, but horribly predictable
One of the things that irritates me a little about Hollywood movies is
that they are normally quite predictable. We can generally tell exactly
how everything will work out about halfway through the movie, and are
completely unsurprised when it turns out that way. That's not a bad
thing in itself, as the journey can often be more enjoyable than the
destination reached.
This is the case in Heartbreakers. The ending is horribly predictable,
and I was very disappointed to see a couple of possibly interesting
twists passed up. What helped me through this movie in the end were the
often funny situations that these two supposedly professional con-women
found themselves in, and the bumbling that took place. I was expecting
the girls to be fully in control of all situations, so was very happy to
see so many situations go pear shaped for them.
Okay, I'll admit it. Jennifer Love Hewitt's outfits helped a lot too :-)
This one is definitely a chick-flick, but a good one at that. It will at
least entertain the boyfriend enough that he'll be able to enjoy it (if
only for the aforementioned costumes).
6/
Beverly Hills Family Robinson (1997)
Not enough Sarah to make it worthwhile...
I sat through the entire film for one reason only - glimpses of the delightful Sarah Michelle Gellar. While SMG does appear several times (invariably in some form of bikini top) it's not often enough to make up for the rest of this execrable production.
A well-to-do Beverly Hills family find themselves stranded on a deserted island and pull together to 'make do'. One of the hilarious aspects of this film is just how well they manage to adapt to their new surroundings. Within a few weeks we not only have a 3 bedroom house constructed, but we've got a working power supply, dishwasher and electric lights. The air conditioning is on its way. Basically, the technology on the island is best described as Gilligan's Island on crack.
Of course, there are some nasties on the island too, but I wouldn't want to give too much away.
Now, on to the acting. Martin Mull (dad) and SMG (daughter) put in pretty good performances. Everyone else does a very poor job, the sort of stuff you'd expect on a low-budget Disney family movie. I had serious problems deciding whether the Ryan O'Donohue (son) was actually male or female too.
There are plot holes you could drive a truck through, and many leads are not followed up.
The soundtrack is appalling, the usual children's TV type of muzak. Bad stuff indeed.
All of that said, I must admit to laughing heartily at just how pathetic this production was, so it is worthwhile from a comedy perspective. I would imagine that little kids would love the movie too - unsurprising as they are the target audience.
All up, 3 out of 10 (2 for the laughs at how bad the film was, 1 for the occasional glimpse of SMG in a bikini top).
Dancer in the Dark (2000)
Get through the start, the rest is worth it
After the first 15 minutes of this film, I seriously doubted that I'd be able to watch it through to the end. The camerawork was appalling, the actors spoke their lines over each other, there seemed to be no direction that the film was heading and, did I mention how bad the camerawork was?
I decided to soldier on, having heard too many good things about this film to give up yet. I'm glad that I did. I won't go into the plot (which, no doubt, has been covered extensively by other reviewers), but simply say that this is a story of discovering what is really important to oneself, and knowing what path one must take to reach that goal.
Bjork puts in an amazing effort, along with several of the key cast members. Her unique vocal styles are used to good effect in the songs through the film and blend very well with what is happening in the film.
I would still like to write off much of the camerawork (I just DONT LIKE the jerky hand-held out-of-focus attempt at being arty), but even this fades into the background as the story of Selma Yeskova takes over.
My vote of 8 includes points off for the camerawork (did I mention how bad it is?) and the very shaky start. Its a shame that some people will turn the film off before it really gets started.
Have patience with the beginning, it really does improve!
Vampyros Lesbos (1971)
Let's be honest about why we're really watching this...
Did you pick up a copy of "Lesbian Vampires" for any reason other than softcore sex? I didn't think so.
I had the wonderful fortune of stumbling across this movie late-night on local Australian TV station SBS. This station is well known for screening foreign films of this nature. And what a find!
I must admit to not paying much attention to the plot, but then it wasn't too hard to follow exactly what was happening most of the time. All of the key elements of B-grade movies are there - the freaky camerawork, the vacant stares of many of the actors, the implausible excuses for gratuitous nudity. It all gels well together in this little excursion.
I rated this movie a 3, because to rate it higher would do it injustice to its B-grade heritage. It would score much higher in B-grade circles, for the cheese factor and the provision of stuff to poke fun at. Fun stuff.
Tomcats (2001)
Lighthearted fun with a lot of sex
I feel that Tomcats has been unfairly criticised by the, er, critics. After all, it ends up being exactly what it set out to be - a very funny movie aimed at the late teen to early 20's male audience.
The main plot itself is quite predictable, and you won't get a lot of surprises on the way there, but there's a lot of fun to be had.
I was interested to note that one of the lowest rating demographics for this movie was females under 18 (not surprising), but that females 18 - 29 were one of the highest rating demographics. Perhaps the older girls enjoy watching some of the hero's misfortunes?
If you're not in the mood for a sweeping Epic, but would prefer to kick back in front of the video with some friends for a laugh, I would definitely recommend this movie. 7/10
Shrek (2001)
Adult comedy you can take the kids to!
Shrek is not just a kids film - don't be fooled by the rating. It's extremely funny and entertaining for audiences of all ages. Like the Simpsons, the kids will enjoy it a lot, but will have more than a few jokes go over their heads.
Simply put, this is a classic fairy tale with a wicked twist. You'll see a lot of classic characters in there, but not in the way that you might think. One of the great things about the film is seeing just what they've done with all of the classic fairy tales to fit them in.
The performances by all 4 main voice-actors were excellent (Eddie Murphy being the jewel in the crown) and the graphics were amazing. I don't know if I should really say any more than that - I don't want to give anything away!
It should really come as no surprise that this film is doing so well and is _killing_ Pearl Harbour at the box office. Hollywood needs to take a long hard look at this film and work out what the rest of their scriptwriters should be aiming at. See
The Mummy Returns (2001)
An enjoyable ride on the coat-tails of the first
I didn't really know what to expect from The Mummy Returns. On one hand, it had the potential to be a work of art, taking what was built from the original movie and adding to it. On the other hand, it could be another tired rehash of the same film. In the end it was a bit of both.
The film certainly looks very nice. The special effects (with the exception of the Scorpion King) are superb and really convey a sense of power. Imhotep and his effects are handled very nicely.
There is very little, if any, character development in the film. That said, a lot of background information left out of the original is provided and some questions about the first film are answered. This is a lot of fun for those who like tie-ins to other films. However, a lot of the jokes used in the original are reused here (homage, or rehash?)
The plot premise is believable and the scriptwriters did a good job of providing everyone with a reason to be in the film. Plot inconsistencies are rare. I've seen a lot worse lately (e.g. Red Planet).
If you're an action fan, look no further. This film is non-stop. In fact, there's almost too much of it. We don't get the chance to stop and take a breather for much of the film. Unfortunately, that means that the journey is largely glossed over in favour of hacking and slaying (not that that's a bad thing).
Overall I felt that it was a good film, provided that you've seen the original. Those seeing this alone will probably not get as much out of it. 7/10
The Roller Blade Seven (1991)
So bad you can enjoy it as a comedy
I knew that I was not about to see a quality film when this title was included in a 'B-grade video night' at a friends place. Despite the warnings, I was still surprised at just how bad this film was. It was fortunate that there were a lot of us there to share the pain with each other... The film attempts to tell the story of a dark future, one in which Hawk (a Mad Max type of character) heads off to rescue a damsel in distress. In reality, the plot is a thinly disguised excuse for the producers to promote their own philosophies on life (watch the end credits and the 'these people are not real' disclaimer at the end for a real laugh). The movie is frequently lacking direction, and fails to develop its characters to any degree whatsoever. What's even worse though is the editing of this film. The film repeats scenes (often 10 to 20 seconds long) up to 4 or 5 times in a row. I think that this was an attempt to emulate things like Jean Claude Van-Damme fight sequences, but if it is it fails utterly. The film would probably be about 1/3 of its length if we weren't forced to watch the main character move his head in front of the setting sun half a dozen times (yes, that's all that happens in that repeated scene). I give this movie my 'worst film I've ever seen' award. I doubt that it will be topped any time soon.