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ajdemao
Reviews
The Mummy (2001)
Watched as a kid
I was 3-5 when I saw this. No older or younger as I moved house when I was 6 and the fact I remember it at all. As a matter of fact, I've never watched The Mummy. I saw the trailer for the Tom Cruise one where the audio was messed up but I didn't watch the movie. Why are all of these reviews like articulate adults? Like I would assume it would be a bunch of people who also had it as kids, but I guess not. I'm curious as to how many people saw this as children. I was able to remember it by finding a copy in a dollar general dollar bin.
Big Mouth (2017)
Worse
Imagine South Park but the people who wrote South Park weren't funny, weren't intelligent, and didn't care.
Big Mouth (2017)
Worse
Imagine South Park but the people who wrote South Park weren't funny, weren't intelligent, and didn't care.
The Lion King (2019)
Worse
I can't think of a way to make The Lion King pre-visualization into a worse final product. Having the lion king be in the style of a nature documentary is a great idea. Too bad it didn't happen. Much like how Aladdin was supposed to be like a Bollywood film this one had all the creativity sucked from it. I don't like this movie. I don't like you. Stop.
Avatar: The Last Airbender (2005)
A Good Show with a few (mostly non-consequential) Issues
My only real issue were the times when the characters explained their motivations out loud for no reason. The most blatant examples is in Book 3 Episode 11. Which is exactly the worst Book in my opinion. Other than that it's good if you pretend the filler episodes never happened.
Max Payne 3 (2012)
A Game Made by People who didn't Understand the Series
The original Max Payne is a parody of the generic detective story. His name is "Max Payne," his wife and daughter are dead, he speaks in metaphors and he constantly has self serious voice over narrations. That was the joke of the game. It was also somewhat innovative with its bullet time mechanic. Max Payne 3 is exactly what the original was parodying but without the innovation. The story is basically only "anything but subtle juxtaposition" on top of a great example of a recent, male, Mary Sue in gaming. He isn't interested in much past serving the plot which wouldn't be a problem if they didn't retcon the parody aspect.
A Wrinkle in Time (2018)
Bland
Fateful Findings is more coherent and it has more red herrings than characters and more dead plot lines than it's budget. This makes Justice League look like Under The Skin. If someone I knew told me they liked this movie I'd never talk to them again. It's not even funny bad. It's just bland and boring. There is nothing to make fun of.
Far Cry 3 (2012)
Too high of an average rating
This has a higher rating than Inside, Limbo, and Hotline Miami..... Fine narrative. Fine gameplay. Yet nothing was really even innovative at the time.
Hotline Miami (2012)
A near perfect game and a benchmark for the medium as a whole
One of the most impressive things in a game narrative is to make gameplay an important aspect. Many have tried with various levels of success but most talk about Titanfall 2 or The Last of Us. Hotline Miami does this perfectly. I already did a really long review on my steam so you can check that out if you are so inclined on the account Ranesir, but this game excels in every aspect.