brodiebruce_405 Reviews

Millennium: Jose Chung's 'Doomsday Defense' (1997) Season 2, Episode 9

Just a note on the other review...

[10/10 · 20 November 2013]

The blonde Lance Henriksen was supposed to be Omar Goopta/L. Ron Hubbard's character, not Jose Chung's, as the other reviewer stated.

However, everything else he said is right. This is another Darin Morgan masterpiece, but I prefer his second Millennium episode, "Somehow Satan Got Behind Me", which is the perfect lead in to the finale of Season 2 (and what should have been the series finale). It's funny (with Charles Nelson Reilly once again shining for the last time in the role, which should have been spun off if you ask me), clever, disturbing in the right way...it's a really great departure and every bit as fully formed and intelligent as you'd expect from Darin Morgan, the only TV auteur who drifted from show to show, never creating one but always with his own unique voice.

Stalled (I) (2013)

More John Hughes than John Carpenter, a zombie movie that's not exploitational

[8/10 · 14 November 2013]

I was lucky enough to see this based on the fact I was a huge fan of the team's first feature, FREAK OUT, also written by and starring Dan Palmer and directed by Christian James. This is not quite more of the same - Freak Out was a handmade, home-made movie taking years to film and has confident-low-budget-feel that comes from that kind of production and the somewhat leisurely pace of it. By virtue of it's setting and plotting, STALLED lacks the scope of FREAK OUT which, in the long tradition of horror/monster movies, functioned almost as a travelogue for small towns in general, but it gains in every other area because it is clearly a more professional production, shot on a tight schedule (almost all of it on one set), with more of a cohesive whole.

The writing is a lot more confident - if Freak Out was driven by an infectious craziness - a low-budget British attempt at an early Joe Dante film - this is more like Joss Whedon's writing. There's a heavy emphasis on character, a lot of fun with words and clichés, gratuitous pop culture references (including some very important ones to "Jingle All the Way") and a sweet natured affection throughout. Palmer has called it a cross between "Career Opportunities", a much maligned and neglected John Hughes production about coming of age (it was sort of a riff on both "The Breakfast Club" and "Home Alone", but with a love relationship at the core) and George A. Romero's original "Day of the Dead". The latter influence is almost exclusively on the (extremely) confined environment and the zombie presence - none of that film's ugly nihilism is really present, but much of the former's charm is present and in this day and age, that's more impressive to me. Anyone can now fill the screen with zombies and gore, but how many can actually make you care about the characters, especially when there are really only two of them that matter? With an ensemble cast, peripheral characters can alienate us - with only two characters (one of whom is barely seen, more on that in a sec) the audience is potentially stuck with people they hate - the film pulls this off completely.

Our main character is W.C. (that's an abbreviation of "Water Closet", a term for a toilet in case you missed it...it's a throwaway joke, the film is funnier than that) played by Palmer. I don't want to spoil the movie but he's basically a crook with some reasons - selfish, immature but understandable ones. This movie doesn't really want to be "Attack the Block" (which is fine with me, I hated it) and make some bold social statement, but it does use the underlying tension of that for some neat character business. Think more along the lines of Dante's infidelity in "Clerks" than interpreting the zombies as the supernatural guilt manifestations as in an Edgar Allen Poe story.

The other character is "Evie", and I'm somewhat limited about what I can say about her without spoiling the film. Some of the film she functions as an avatar for W.C. to speak to sight-unseen (think "Wilson" in "Castaway"), and in other scenes has a more profound interaction with W.C. (now think "Wilson" in "Home Improvement", barely glimpsed over the fence). She has an arc of her own that it's not fair to spoil, but let it be said it does get you in the heart and speaks to a pretty neglected section of society. In a sea of "Strippers VS Zombies", "Strippers VS Vampires", "Vampire Zombie Strippers" and "Strippers VS Hookers", this stands apart from the noisy soft-core "dvd premiere" zombie toilet.

There are some problems in the film - the movie was shot digital and has a bit of a synthetic look to it, but the story and writing worked well enough that I didn't mind. The set's convincing, the music fantastic (a Tangerine Dream/Mark Isham's score for the original "The Hitcher" feel) and the zombies serviceable.

There is a moment where I have to wonder why the zombies all exclaim "Brains" in one key scene, not in evidence in the rest of the picture, in the manner of the "Return of the Living Dead" zombies (and every zombie parody from 1985-2000, including The Simpsons and South Park).

I do also think the ending, which most people liked, could've stood to lose the last 20 seconds or so. There's a phone call which wraps up the plot quite neatly and nothing more needed to be done, I have to say I thought it was a development too far, but I'm probably in the minority there. My feeling is simply that when the movie was over, what stayed with me wasn't the brilliance of the concept (epic apocalypse, most mundane and awful seat to watch from) but the writing and characterisation wrung out of such a limited situation and cast. To have that final image felt incongruous with the, yes, journey I went on with the characters. In other words, those final few moments ruined the entire film for me and retroactively made me hate their first film...JUST KIDDING.

I guerrieri dell'anno 2072 (1984)

Somewhat underrated Fulci film

[5/10 · 12 March 2013]

Totally unconvincing as an actual view at the future, New Gladiators (aka: "Rome 2072: The New Gladiators" or "Fighting Centurions") is none the less an extremely entertaining Sci-Fi action programmer from Lucio Fulci. At times gory, action packed (full of exploding-for-no-reason vehicles), cheese-tastic dialogue ("Go to Hell!", "I would - if I thought it would increase my ratings!") and delicious scenery reused from other Italian sci-fi films, giving the film the feel of an episode of Doctor Who circa 1983 as directed by slow-minded aliens.

Jared Martin, of the 1980s War of the Worlds series and Fulci's own AENIGMA, is our hero - the star Killbike champion. It's hard to tell if he is the star of the TV show Killbike BEFORE he's framed for murdering the Clockwork Orange-esque gang who murdered his wife, or if that is a flashback (as indicated by the commentary from Fulci-fan Troma staff) and that's how he became a Killbike star. I think it's the former, though. He finds himself in a prison cell (a one room riff on Stuart Gordon's FORTRESS which had yet to be made) with Fred "The Hammer" Williamson (From Dusk Till Dawn, Black Caesar, New Barbarians etc), Hal Yamagouchi (from "Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou") and Al Cliver (dubbed again by the guy who did Zombie for him), among others. They are trained in hilarious strobe-lit scene with mentally-projected holograms to become more effective killers (this has very little to do with the game show they ultimately compete in), there's a love story, in-fighting, a sadistic guard...You get the picture.

No, words cannot describe the joys of the picture - small model sets, actually entertaining sci-fi ideas (almost universally executed beneath their value) and Riz Ortolani (orchestral composer and film composer for "Cannibal Holocaust" and Fulci's "Don't Torture a Duckling" and "Perversion Story/One On Top of the Other") contributes a scruzzy New Wave rock score which is a total, rip-roaring triumphant cheesefest. Sure, there's only three pieces of music and they loop constantly, but by the end you'll be so happy it won't matter!

The DVD is a fairly typical early 21st century Troma disc - fullscreen video master, stereo, minimal extras. A commentary from the "FBI" (Fulci Benevolant Institution) is just Trent "Killjoy, Dead Girl and Terror Firmer" Haaga and Troma's then-DVD producer Ronni Raygun riffing on the movie. It's unclear whether only some of the affection for the film is sarcastic, or all of it, but it's entertaining enough. There's a short interview with the beautiful Antonella Fulci (not as good as on the "Zombie" blu-ray or Arrow "Gates of Hell" Daughter of Darkness interviews) apparently filmed by herself or a friend (note the Divine "Love Reaction" vinyl prominantly displayed...did she think John Waters owned Troma?), a Dario Argento interview (not a lot involved here, but mention is made of Fulci and how he didn't play a part influencing Dario, at all), a short Robert Englund interview about...Dario Argento, and the usual introduction and trailer. There's also some Troma extras with nothing to do with the film.

Considering it's a full screen video master, and the film is clearly missing some information (yes I would prefer a 1.85:1 transfer but fortunately New Gladiators was not a cinemascope production, so we're not missing too much), the transfer is pretty good. Once you get used to the idea that in this dystopian future, a particular shade of dark green has replaced the colour black, you'll notice it upscales just fine.

Overall, it's the best version of the movie out there I'm aware of (apparently the US Media release cuts out some of the violence) and it's pretty cheap, so pick it up.

Frostbiter: Wrath of the Wendigo (1995)

Frostbiter

[6/10 · 12 March 2013]

Words cannot really encapsulate my strange enjoyment of this movie (admiration and love are both too strong words for this feeling).

Basically a cut-price EVIL DEAD rip off, Frostbiter: Wrath of the Wendigo (on-screen title: WENDIGO) doesn't have a lot to recommend it, at least on the face of it, but none the less is quite an entertaining hour and a half. Some, most critics in fact, have taken it to task for it's slavish copying of Sam Raimi's infinitely superior Evil Dead films, particularly EVIL DEAD II, but I personally admire this aspect of the film. Think of it more as the film equivalent of one of those tribute covers records, where many different bands do all the songs on a classic album. Frostbiter wears it's influences on it's sleeve (even including a torn poster of EVIL DEAD II, both a nod to the classic and to Evil Dead's similar tribute to The Hills Have Eyes), which is a lot more honest than some other Sam Raimi/Evil Dead influenced film-makers (like the watered down hack, Edgar Wright). The presence of one Tom Hitchcock, Stop motion animator/miniature creator of Evil Dead and Evil Dead II, under multiple miniature/compositing/stop motion credits strengthens the Michigan based productions' EVIL DEAD connections, and both Bruce Campbell and David Goodman get Special Thanks too.

The basic elements of the Evil Dead movies are here, whether they're appropriate to the Native American Wendigo myth or not - the cabin (this time covered in snow as is the rest of the woodland, perhaps a homage to The Thing?), the monsters, the possession, the humour, the unexpected heroics, the often-ropey practical effects, the wonderful stop motion, but there's enough of a twist to make it a good choice when you've worn out your Evil Dead II VHS or are scared the DVD or Blu-ray has been played so much, Bruce Campbell's chin will be permanently burned onto your television. The acting is generally awful, but often fun. The effects are ropey and totally ineffective, but again add to the fun. The camera work, storytelling and writing are all way below the standards of the Evil Dead series, which shouldn't surprise ANYONE, but this film is able to turn it's "absolute insane chaos - Evil Dead II style!" strategy into something likely to raise a smile, if not exactly raise the pulse. So having said that, only you know if you're interested in the movie.

Notable Frostbiter: Wrath of the Wendigo facts:

• Not only are scenes from the then Public Domain "It's a Wonderful Life" used as a contrast to the chaos (an idea previously used in Gremlins), the scenes set on the mainland (most of the movie is on an island) also occur in Bedford Falls (as did "It's a Wonderful Life"). Note also the news stations call sign - BDFD.

• Filmed in the late eighties, rather than the late nineties, where the copyright places it.

• Ron Asheton, the late guitarist for The Stooges (and bassist for Iggy & The Stooges, the Raw Power incarnation), plays a major role in the film. Watching the man who wrote the "No Fun" and "I Wanna Be Your Dog" riffs ham it up like a middle-aged Bruce Campbell is a wonderful thing.

• Troma claim the film was based on a comic book from Caliber Press, but that was in fact pressed AFTER the film as a promotional item. Why they would lie about this, I do not know.

The DVD has some Troma produced extras, a ridiculous and apparently unrelated music video where Ron Asheton and his son sing a cringeworthy duet about "Bitchin' Babes" (I don't know what this is, but it made me question my life choices, beginning with "Why am I watching this?"), a historian talking about the Wendigo, an awful intro with the then Troma team etc. Picture is a full-screen video master, stereo...as expected. Doubt this one will ever be reissued. Director Tom Chaney later did the more straight Mosquito, with Gunner "Leatherface" Hanson.

Bikini Bandits (2002 Video)

A moronic T & A show disguised as a satire of a moronic T & A show

[1/10 · 9 September 2012]

Stephen Grasse, the genius between "The Evil Empire: Why I hate the British", a racist tract popular with ignorant bigots, produces a mindless T & A show which, with the use of some brief and totally un-witty cameos from punk legends like Dee Dee Ramone and Jello Biafra of the Dead Kennedys and juvenile jabs at authority figures, attempts to fake a deeper undercurrent. You might call it the "thinking teenagers spank film", because it does just enough to make you think you're not just staring at big silicone breasts swaying under cheap bikini tops, or plastic rayguns bought for 3 for a $1 clutched in hands with even cheaper manicures.

In short: it's a great film, if you're terminally stupid.

Fantastic 40's and Anal 2 (2004 Video)

A sequel that tops the original

[10/10 · 29 May 2012]

Much like Godfather 2 and The Empire Strikes Back, Fantastic 40's and Anal 2 is a sequel that tops the original in every regard. Utiling the most popular elements of the first film (women over 40, anal sex and throw pillows) and featuring even more of these things has produced a sequel that really delivers. Direction is improved, the writing is still of a very high quality, cinematography is a bit bland but the music is finally of a calibre worthy of the film. The DVD does not contain any extras, however; a commentary track for this one would be much appreciated.

Five stars, two stars just for Deauxma's "performance".

Deadly Daphne's Revenge (1987)

Uncle Phil's in it! :D

[6/10 · 4 April 2012]

This film wasn't so bad really, it's about TV movie level, not as exciting as you'd hope for from a Troma pick up at it's best (and nothing like the synopsis on the box) but nowhere near Troma's worst, either. Relax! The highlight was the scene where James Avery shows up, best known as Uncle Phil from Fresh Prince and the voice of Shredder in the original 1987 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoon. It's nifty when a sort-of star like that shows up in a Troma film.

The film, by the way, is clearly a lot older than 1987. James Avery is considerably thinner than he was in either Fletch (1985) or Fresh Prince (which began in 1990), plus everyone's wearing flares, the woman has Farrah Fawcett hair...I imagine it was shot the best part of 10 years earlier.

Big Helium Dog (1999)

Just plain not funny

[1/10 · 8 February 2005]

Random juxtaposition of images and knowingly politically incorrect attitudes are not funny in themselves. Brian Lynch is talentless and I'm glad the Jim Henson Company dropped his Muppets script. This film is an atrocious waste of celluloid. The acting is pathetic, the script so self indulgent you wonder why didn't Brian Lynch just get some hand lotion and Kleenex and avoid wasting everyone else's time and the direction is....wait, WHAT direction? This is fourteen hours of my life (well, two that felt like fourteen) that I can't ever have back. I'd be more content knowing I wasted them walking around my town or sitting on my sofa. Brian Lynch does not understand comedy, he just wants to. The Cigarette Fairy? Kevin Smith as an arty director? Using big words to sound like intelligent comedy? These are not the marks of a comedic auteur. Avoid it!

Citizen Toxie: The Toxic Avenger IV (2000)

Awesome

[10/10 · 2 July 2003]

Amazing sequel, truly fantastic. It gets better each time you watch it. A lot of cool cameo appearances, great jokes and deaths, better acting than usual (in a good way-still cheesy but more watchable).

Either Lloyd's best film, or just under Tromeo but either way one hell of a film. I laughed more in this one than I did in both American Pies, There's something about Mary and Me, myself and I put together. Plus I learnt a little from this one :D

Good times! A rating of 8 out of 10!

Class of Nuke 'Em High (1986)

Good film

[2 July 2003]

I think every fan of tromas work should see this, it's one of the early films that made troma what it was. After their 4 sex comedies and buying Bloodsucking Freaks, Toxic Avenger was the first truly Tromatic film and this is the follow up where they do MORE. I love this film to death it's amazing with cheey eighties special effects, comic book plot, good music and good jokes. A lot of fun, you'll enjoy it if you like Troma's other stuff...Not recommended as a starting point.