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7/10
Never original, but fun
3 October 2012
Here's the thing... you know where this movie is going to go. All the plot points are pretty obvious; it's never going to get ahead of you, even when the "twists" start in the back half.

But it's pretty fun to watch. DeVito and Bates are completely cartoonish and over-the-top -- and that's what makes them great together. Edward Hermann and Christine Baranski are perfectly cast, though I wish we'd seen more of them. Everybody else is fine (Bob Odenkirk is a bit wasted -- given that "anger management" is a major theme of the movie, casting a man known for his comedic anger in a role where he doesn't get angry is strange), except for Livingston.

Ron Livingston is the center of the movie, and there's a problem. He commits to playing the role a certain way, and you don't understand why, and you don't really like him. More than an hour into the movie, they reveal why he is acting the way he did, and it kind of makes sense, but he's already lost your sympathy by that point.

But if Devito and Bates as total white trash screaming at each other, lines like "If brains was chocolate, you wouldn't even have a M&M" is something you want to see in a comedy, then you should see this movie, because there will probably never be another movie where that happens. If you go with them, they keep the movie entertaining.

Stick around for the end credits, their duet is almost certainly the highlight of the film. It's in the film, but most of the lyrics are obscured by the dialogue; the song plays in all of its glory over the end credits.
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1/10
never ever waste your time
7 December 2006
This movie was so terrible that I began, over the course of it, to question the very idea of making movies, because if movies this bad can be made, obviously something is fundamentally wrong with the process.

I stuck with it hoping that there would be some glimmer of a reason that this many talented people would be involved in such a waste of a movie, and there was absolutely nothing about it remotely worth discussion. A complete waste of anything and everything.

Apparently I have to write more about this in order for my warning to be posted, so let me say that the cinematography seemed competent, I suppose, but, given that they had a budget, that's hardly anything to celebrate.

I love Billy Bob Thornton in anything, but I would recommend 'Bad News Bears' before this. I like the idea of Quaid as a mobster, but by the time he showed up, the movie could not be saved.
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1/10
bad student films suck
27 December 2001
Okay, I go to NYU, so take anything I say with a grain of salt. Of course, because I'm at NYU, I have to watch a whole bunch of s****y student films. Among them was this one, noteworthy only for the casting (which, allegedly, was due to a high school friendship with at least one of the actors). What seemed like it might be a decent idea quickly degenerated into a stupid attempt to be as "shocking" as possible, with poorly staged (and horribly scripted) "worst deeds ever" being shown. I won't go into the soundtrack, because as cliched as its use is, I actually like "American Woman" and a few others.

I don't want to spend longer writing this review than it takes to watch the short, but I'll just hit a few more bullet points: -- Remember in "Can't Hardly Wait", when they freeze frame on every major character and give you quick yearbook bios of them? So does the guy who made this. -- A scene that's supposed to be awful (a dog being beaten to death), and make the audience hate the main characters, but instead inspired laughter from the crowd. This caused more than one person to say that they hated the scene because it was so clear that it shouldn't have been funny. We're not talking about singin' "Singin' In The Rain" during a rape or anything. Trust me, I'll laugh at plenty of things that would make the Pope weep, and I laughed at that part, but doing so made me, and everybody else, angry. -- It freeze frames on the girl from "7th Heaven" when her face is blocked by her hair, yet we're supposed to recognize her later. -- James Franco (a truly talented actor, and the reason I was looking forward to seeing the short, actually) is forced to play Daniel Desario (from "Freaks and Geeks") again, only without the oppurtunity to provide it with any nuance. Even so, he rises above the material and is able to give portions of a powerful performance, whenever he doesn't have to speak.

I only bothered to review this because nobody else ever had, proving once and for all that the IMDb should not allow student films, period. If they're going to, though, it should be worthy ones, and not just because the cast happens to be in other things (which is, officially, the reason this is listed).

However, it is obvious that the guy who made this has a strong future as a casting agent.
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